The Down Range Forum
Member Section => Politics & RKBA => Topic started by: Teresa Heilevang on January 08, 2008, 12:28:02 PM
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I got this from a friend of mine and thought it might lighten the mood up in here a bit. :D
Although it really DOES have a whole lot of common sense ring to it.
M'Ette
Want to know how to win the war on terrorists? Draft Guys over 60
"Send Prior Service Vets over 60 "
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. (You can't be older than 42 to join the military.)
They've got the whole thing backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
For starters:
Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. "My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry!" We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m.
Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, "I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.
If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we like soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Sgt now, "Get down and give me ... er ... one."
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten cowards who attacked us on September 11. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.
If nothing else, put us on the border and I guarantee we'll have it secured the first night.
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Well.... Let me just say I'm glad I'm not 60 yet. ;D
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Ill do the border gig anytime. Not the sandbox. :P
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Ill do the border gig anytime.
Only if armed and allowed to defend myself.
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I wouldn't go to Iraq, but I could be persuaded to go on an Osama hunt.
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Well, what I mean by that, sir, is... if you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and includin' one mile of Adolf Hitler (er... Osama bin Laden, I mean) with a clear line of sight, sir... pack your bags, fellas, war's over. Amen.
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I'm 61 and that does have a nice ring to it...free travel, free food, free clothes and especially getting paid to shoot all the ammo I want. I'd sign up if I could remember where I put my reading glasses and cane.
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I'm 61 and that does have a nice ring to it...free travel, free food, free clothes and especially getting paid to shoot all the ammo I want. I'd sign up if I could remember where I put my reading glasses and cane.
Please stand in front of me when you shoot! ;D
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Actually I'm a pretty big target too!
Thanks for your vote of confidence!!!!!!!
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I'm not 60 yet, but if that no neck drill Sgt. can figure out where to cut the bifocal on my glasses so I can see through the scope I'll be on the next flight. How about 3:30 AM, I get up to pee then anyway, and if you don't let me go I just get more pissed, so to speak, anyway.
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Well. I'm 53 now (soon 54) and that sounds about right to me.
I get up and it all hurts so why go back to bed, I'm never in a GREAT mood so what the H, shoot the SOB and make it better.
Kids need time to grow and I have "been there, done that",and now the world just pi$$e$ me off so give me a chance to blow off some steam.
Sounds like a job, where do I sign.
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I'm with Hazcat, I'm only 48 but I could probably get a waiver for extra crankiness. When I was an active duty Marine jimmy carter let the Iranians crap on us, just after I left active duty Reagan let Hezbollah get away with killing a couple hundred of my brother Marines in Beruit, During Gulf war 1 I was in the Guard and got sent to Luisiana, (spelling?)
In '03 I was talking to a recruiter to see about getting back in the Guard, but a heart attack interfered. I am sick of always being a brides maid, It's frustrating. Besides , I can't afford my own automatic weapons :D
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The wheels are shot and I can only walk short distances; but if the bad guys can at least move slowly, I have three 30-round AR 15 mags handy and full of greentips. I can at least make their life interesting for a while.
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Forgot another possible qualification for this special squad - I believe that surviving a kidney stone makes one immune to all kinds of torture, and gives the insight that charging that machine gun nest beats sitting around waiting for the next stone to move.
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Forgot another possible qualification for this special squad - I believe that surviving a kidney stone makes one immune to all kinds of torture, and gives the insight that charging that machine gun nest beats sitting around waiting for the next stone to move.
I'll see your stone and raise you TWO heart attacks. ;D
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It sounds like all we have to do, is fill a bunch of camlebacks up with Geritol and this war is over!
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Conagher, Everyone rides to war now, Humvees, Bradley's , Strykers etc. this has 3 advantages for us, No marching , bigger toys and MORE AMMO :D
Hazcat, I'd rather have another heart attack than recover from another Hernia operation, Heart attack only hurt while it was happening, feeling that darn door screen for 2 months was really unpleasant.
ismram, I resemble that comment :)
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Yea but the enemy would run and hide when they saw that hummer coming with it's left turn signal on! ;D
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So use the tourist gambit, Turn right and nail them.
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Sounds good to me. I'm 66 and ready to go, although my wife won't like it. This way my friend who is there now can come home and take care of his 3 little ones.
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I'll see your stone and raise you TWO heart attacks. ;D
I'll see your two heart attacks, and raise you a heart attack and quadruple bypass.
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I'll see your two heart attacks, and raise you a heart attack and quadruple bypass.
Yeah! Well...how about I'm 53 and have a 14 year old son to teach driving to! :)
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Only 2 Heart attacks Hazcat, I'm impressed with your patience , and courage.
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Yeah! Well...how about I'm 53 and have a 14 year old son to teach driving to! :)
So I guess the saying isn't just young and stupid!! ;D
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So I guess the saying isn't just young and stupid!! ;D
Nope! Old and FUN loving!
Ya know how this happens don't ya? We're just pokin' fun at them and they go and take it serious! ;D
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I have thought up a two color flag for the regimental colors. Gray and bald.. I'm in. Mac.
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I have thought up a two color flag for the regimental colors. Gray and bald.. I'm in. Mac.
I resemble that flag. ;D
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You can't truly be bald if you're "Gray and bald"...unless you're talking about your fleshtone.
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Some is one, some is the other, but we all seem to march, generally, in the same direction.. Sort of,, like, a MILITIA! Mac
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You can't truly be bald if you're "Gray and bald"...unless you're talking about your fleshtone.
You obviously havet started going bald yet ;)
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I'm only 36,but I wake up at 3:30 to pee to. I'd love to go but my wife would kill me for sure,and from what I here about the hadjis she's a hell of a lot better shot.Mabey I should just send her ???
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You obviously havet started going bald yet ;)
Got a head like a cue ball.
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I haven't been to the "sandbox" yet but have spent the last 19 years in the Air Force. I'd love a chance to go "downrange" and put my training to use.
As for my man Fred, he's just not appealing to as much of the masses as I would have liked him to. I guess the American public aren't ready for a President that speaks his mind and tells it like it is. I guess there are still many out there who want someone to tuck them in at night and tell them that everything will be allright. Well, You and I both know that it won't be allright until more people who think like us take a stronger stand and make something happen.
Just my two cents.
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Well, what I mean by that, sir, is... if you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and includin' one mile of Adolf Hitler (er... Osama bin Laden, I mean) with a clear line of sight, sir... pack your bags, fellas, war's over. Amen.
If it only were that easy - trouble is, the scum that enabled him still have political and monetary power in Saudi Arabia.
Actually, one thing I had just gotten an idea about this afternoon - send emo-kids out after them.
"The world is miserable. Life isn't worth living. Give death some thought - the USEA - United States Emo Army. Go out with STYLE!"
(That might be dark, but what the heck.)