The Down Range Forum
Member Section => Left The Range => Topic started by: sksmedic on March 10, 2013, 12:58:02 AM
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Last night my mom died. She committed suicide. I don't know how to handle this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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My thoughts and prayers are with you!
God Bless,
Richard
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Please handle it like any other death in the family, with dignity and pride. You will look back on it better that way when it all sinks in. In the meantime, please accept our sympathy and prayers. Dominus vobiscum.
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Sorry to see you hurt.
The only thing you can do is handle it as best you can and use every resource available if you feel you need it.
Whether it be family, friends, professionals, private messages to forum members, bartenders or help centers on the phone.
Do what needs to be done like Jrlobo said with pride and dignity. Your Mom deserves that.
Personally, I don't think the manner of death matters.
If you need any help, I'm just down the hill.
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Any death can be difficult to handle, but a mother's death by her own hand is especially troubling.
But you must know and understand that it was not the fault of the mom that gave you life.
The fault that caused her to take her own life lies in something that shorted out in her internal wiring, something over which she had lost control.
None of us can ever know the pain that drives another to welcome the solace of death. We can only know that your mom's earthly pain is now at an end.
For those she left, there is sadness and possibly anger. We have a tendency to blame ourselves, thinking that somehow we could have prevented this if only we had done --fill in the blank--. But that is a road that leads nowhere.
So, please do not allow yourself to fall into that trap.
Know this: None of us can control the thoughts or actions of others.
Your mom dealt with her pain the only way she felt she could. And now, you must deal with the pain of that loss by remembering better times.
The memory of this day will never go away, but it will become less painful as you are able to better see past the immediacy of the event and recall the entirety of her life.
I am deeply sorry for your loss and will pray that you find some peace going forward.
Crusader Rabbit
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I'm so sorry to hear this... you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Over the years, my family has dealt with the suicide of a loved one more than once. At times you'll find solace in the well-intentioned words of others and there will be times when a hug and a shared tear are what you need the most. But at all times draw on the strength and love of your family, friends, and church. Understand that there is nothing to gain from placing blame or shouldering guilt.
It is natural to question why, to wonder if there was something you could have done to prevent this loss, to search for answers that will not be forthcoming. Although a natural part of the sorrow you feel , don't let these Sirens lead you down a path that has nothing to reveal but darker shadows around each corner. Stay in the light which will manifest itself as the love of family, the strength of good friends, and only the fondest memories of your Mom.
God bless.
John
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Go with what CR said, it's right on the money.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss, and especially this way. It ain't easy, my friend, and it ain't your fault. Stay with the good times of your time with your Mom, and leave the rest to the only One who can handle the whole truth.
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As one who has stepped back from the brink understand this.....THERE IS NOTHING YOU COULD HAVE DONE! I'm not sure I can put into words how I felt or what made me step back. In my case it happened so quickly...in the blink of an eye that could have gone the other way.
As has been said, the manner of how you mom left this earth doesn't matter. The love and memories you shared will always be with you and help you and bolster you when you need them. God, family and friends are there for you now. Embrace that warmth and love for all it is worth and your pain will diminish over time.
Again,
God Bless,
Richard
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Thank you all for your kind words. The search for answers today yielded some ugly truths. Though they are ugly and sad, we may now be able to find peace and closure. The advice from the members here is top notch and I plan to follow it the best I can. Thank you.
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Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
God bless is the best I can do, I cannot imagine what you are going through.
Bryan
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I am profoundly sorry for your loss.
May the Lord meet you where you are right now and comfort you in this time of trial.
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I genuinely hope you do find peace.
It's a process that takes time. The amount of time is different for everybody.
Often it seems like you are there and then a bolt from the blue brings it all back. That happens and it's part of the process.
Trust me, it gets better.
Stay steady and grounded in what and who you know and love.
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Can't really add any more to the advice previously posted other than to say I concur.
I do want to offer condolences and say that I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers in dealing with this.
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sksmedic,
Sorry to hear this. All I can say is I'm sorry.
I'll be in touch with a PM this evening.
Mike