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Member Section => Down Range Cafe => Topic started by: twyacht on January 27, 2010, 04:41:52 PM

Title: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: twyacht on January 27, 2010, 04:41:52 PM
News media said he ran out of "gas", seeing how the Hummers are diesel, that's another topic, as "fuel" escaped them...and this guy.

Either way, this is a real dumb-a** who will be going to Leavenworth to "think" about it....for awhile... Nothing like a "low-profile" vehicle to make your getaway......

http://www.myfoxorlando.com/dpp/news/crime/012610awol-soldier-accused-of-stealing-humvee

AWOL soldier accused of stealing Humvee

Updated: Wednesday, 27 Jan 2010, 3:01 PM EST
Published : Wednesday, 27 Jan 2010, 12:50 AM EST

      By Kelly Joyce
      FOX 35 News

A U.S Army soldier was arrested Monday in Volusia County. Deputies say he stole a military Humvee and took off.
Deputies say Private Sean Johnson drove the Humvee from his army base at Fort Stewart in Georgia all the way into Volusia when he ran out of gas.

A Volusia County deputy saw the vehicle stranded on Interstate 95 near the Port Orange exit and stopped to check it out.
He got suspicious when Johnson didn't have any military paperwork to prove he was on a military mission.

The deputy called the Army. Army police say Johnson was AWOL and had stolen the Humvee earlier in the week.
Johnson is in the Volusia County jail facing grand theft charges.



Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: fightingquaker13 on January 27, 2010, 04:56:31 PM
News media said he ran out of "gas", seeing how the Hummers are diesel, that's another topic, as "fuel" escaped them...and this guy.

Either way, this is a real dumb-a** who will be going to Leavenworth to "think" about it....for awhile... Nothing like a "low-profile" vehicle to make your getaway......

http://www.myfoxorlando.com/dpp/news/crime/012610awol-soldier-accused-of-stealing-humvee

AWOL soldier accused of stealing Humvee

Updated: Wednesday, 27 Jan 2010, 3:01 PM EST
Published : Wednesday, 27 Jan 2010, 12:50 AM EST

      By Kelly Joyce
      FOX 35 News

A U.S Army soldier was arrested Monday in Volusia County. Deputies say he stole a military Humvee and took off.
Deputies say Private Sean Johnson drove the Humvee from his army base at Fort Stewart in Georgia all the way into Volusia when he ran out of gas.

A Volusia County deputy saw the vehicle stranded on Interstate 95 near the Port Orange exit and stopped to check it out.
He got suspicious when Johnson didn't have any military paperwork to prove he was on a military mission.

The deputy called the Army. Army police say Johnson was AWOL and had stolen the Humvee earlier in the week.
Johnson is in the Volusia County jail facing grand theft charges.




Of course it happened in Florida. ::) My state, home of the weird. We really need to change our state song from "Seawannee River" by Stephen Foster to "Lawyers Guns and Money" by Warren Zevon. Lets just be honest here. :-[ :-[ :-[
FQ13
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: tt11758 on January 27, 2010, 05:13:37 PM
What kind of a dumbass stays WITH the stolen vehicle when it runs out of fuel?!?  Jeez, why not just erect a neon "ARREST ME PLEASE" sign?!?
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: Big Frank on January 27, 2010, 05:35:12 PM
Don't take one of these either. Too conspicous going down the highway in the wee hours. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M88_Recovery_Vehicle
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: tt11758 on January 27, 2010, 05:50:09 PM
Don't take one of these either. Too conspicous going down the highway in the wee hours. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M88_Recovery_Vehicle


I think even the LEO who came for Haz's guns would be suspicious of THAT badboy.
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: seeker_two on January 27, 2010, 06:29:04 PM
All he needed was the General's daughter.....  ;D
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: tombogan03884 on January 28, 2010, 02:07:26 AM
Of course it happened in Florida. ::) My state, home of the weird. We really need to change our state song from "Seawannee River" by Stephen Foster to "Lawyers Guns and Money" by Warren Zevon. Lets just be honest here. :-[ :-[ :-[
FQ13

Am I the only one who sees a connection here ?  ;D
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: philw on January 28, 2010, 04:13:48 AM
Am I the only one who sees a connection here ?  ;D

nope ;)
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: Walkeraviator on January 28, 2010, 08:43:07 AM
Why is it always Volusia County?  Its like Daytona is a homing beacon for stupid....  I was once pulled over for DWW in Daytona (Driving While White)... the cop pulled me over cuz it was after midnight in the "dark" part of town and was afraid they would carjack the poor defensless white boy in his jeep. 
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: crusader rabbit on January 28, 2010, 09:42:35 AM
Why is it always Volusia County?  Its like Daytona is a homing beacon for stupid....  I was once pulled over for DWW in Daytona (Driving While White)... the cop pulled me over cuz it was after midnight in the "dark" part of town and was afraid they would carjack the poor defensless white boy in his jeep. 

Volusia doesn't get ALL the nut jobs.  We have any number of them here in Pinellas, and Hernando and Palm Beach are frequently well represented on the dumber-than-dirt list.  Hillsborough has had some hot teachers bumping uglies with highschool students, and Pasco...  Well, there is some serious retardation observable in Pasco.  It's a Florida thang...  California has its flakes and nuts, but Florida owns the crazies market! ;D
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: Pathfinder on January 28, 2010, 10:20:14 AM
Volusia doesn't get ALL the nut jobs.  We have any number of them here in Pinellas, and Hernando and Palm Beach are frequently well represented on the dumber-than-dirt list.  Hillsborough has had some hot teachers bumping uglies with highschool students, and Pasco...  Well, there is some serious retardation observable in Pasco.  It's a Florida thang...  California has its flakes and nuts, but Florida owns the crazies market! ;D

Damn, that takes me back.

My Dad used to live in New Port Richie, and then Hudson. Driving down there was so damn weird. If it wasn't the old farts only visible only because of their hat over their seat backs in their Caddies in the left lane with their left turn signal on - doing half the speed limit  (yeah, I know, stereotyping, but in this case very real), then it was the rednecks. AT that time, you could go a couple miles (tops) east of US 19 and find tin roof shacks on cinder blocks with 2-12 derelict cars in an overgrown yard - also on cinder blocks.

I had one guy whipping through traffic, coming up fast behind me, and before I could get out of his way, he cut to my right and passed me. I remember this for a number of reasons:

1. He was cast right out of Deliverance, and I ain't talking about the banjo player on the porch; skraggly beard, greasy ball cap and long hair to match
2. His car (Ford Fairlane IIRC) was dented rather severely. No, that's not right, too mild. It looked like someone had taken a ball peen hammer to ever damn square inch of sheet metal
3. His car (Ford Fairlane IIRC) was also painted in woodland (kind of) camo
4. He had a can of beer in his left hand, sort of dangling out of the open window, I guess to keep the beer cold. And I also guess the car painted camo made him invisible to any cops who might otherwise frown on the whole beer-while-driving thing
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: tombogan03884 on January 28, 2010, 11:40:02 AM
 Darn Path, even a Yankee like me knows that Beer ain't drinking, that's liquid cereal.
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: blackwolfe on January 29, 2010, 09:41:08 PM
Darn Path, even a Yankee like me knows that Beer ain't drinking, that's liquid cereal.


Breakfast in a can is what we use to call it.
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: tt11758 on January 30, 2010, 11:03:33 AM
Darn Path, even a Yankee like me knows that Beer ain't drinking, that's liquid cereal.

There were times when I was in college that we would put beer ON our cereal.  (Hey, we were out of milk, ok?!?)  ;D
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: Big Frank on January 30, 2010, 06:48:34 PM
One time I made an ice cream float with beer. I don't reccomend it. I was used to drinking German dark beer and when I had an American beer it tasted like fizzy water, so...  :P
Title: Re: If You Go AWOL, Don't Take The Base's Hummer.
Post by: PegLeg45 on January 30, 2010, 06:53:26 PM
A friend of mine was in the Marines and he told me their base 'hummer' was a bleach-blond named Bambi....  :-\


 :o  :o  :o



 ;D

I know, I know, I know......off to the corner.................      :-\