The Down Range Forum
Member Section => Down Range Cafe => Topic started by: Fatman on September 27, 2008, 07:46:40 PM
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Woman wakes up, should have smelled the coffee
57 minutes ago
It wasn't just the caffeine that gave an Iowa woman an extra jolt after she had her morning coffee. It was also the bat she found in the filter.
The Iowa Department of Public Health says the woman reported a bat in her house but wasn't too worried about it. She turned on her automatic coffee maker before bedtime and drank her coffee the next morning.
She discovered the bat in the filter when she went to clean it that night. The woman has undergone treatment for possible rabies.
Health officials say that the bat was sent to a lab but that its brain was too cooked by the hot water to determine whether it had rabies.
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Information from: The Gazette, http://www.gazetteonline.com/
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A little garlic in the coffee may help in the future. ;D
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No problem it was holy water. She boiled the Hell out of it.
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She never noticed any difference in the flavor? ??? That was some really bad coffee. Or a really good bat. :)
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"Holy Bat-Java, Batman...."
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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I wonder if she had to go to the BATroom more than usual?
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I wonder if she had to go to the BATroom more than usual?
Ouch. Was that really necessary? That is just beyond the pale.
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Everybody's a critic!
Richard
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Yesterday in News Of The Weird there was another bat related story. A teenager was stunned to find that a baby bat had been curled up inside her bra for five hours - as she was wearing it.
Abbie Hawkins, a hotel receptionist, thought her mobile phone was ringing when she felt vibrations coming from her clothes.
But she later discovered the tiny creature tucked away in the padded pocket of her underwear.
As staff and colleagues crowded around, Miss Hawkins, 19, produced the frightened bat, which was the size of her hand.
She said: "Once I realised it was a bat I was shocked, but then I felt quite sorry for it really.
"It looked very snug in there and I thought how mean I was for disturbing it."
Miss Hawkins said she got dressed at 7.30am and arrived for work at the Holiday Inn Norwich North, near Norwich International Airport without noticing anything unusual.
"When I was driving to work I felt a slight vibration but I thought it was just my mobile phone in my jacket pocket," she said.
It was not until her lunch break, at midday when she felt a strange movement inside her bra, which had been hanging on her washing line the previous night.
"I plucked up the courage to investigate and I pulled out a little baby bat. I just lost my breath when I saw it and I did not know what it was at first," she said.
The teenager's general manager freed the bat in the hotel garden.
"I keep thinking how could I have not known it was there?" Miss Hawkins said. "I will certainly be checking my bras every morning from now on."
Jaime Eastham, of the Bat Conservation Trust, said they had never heard of a bat being found in a bra before.
But she said the animals roost anywhere that appears dark and safe.
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Everybody's a critic!
Richard
Coming from a smartdonkey like myself that is actually a seal of approval. Shhhhh! Keep it a secret.
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Yesterday in News Of The Weird there was another bat related story. A teenager was stunned to find that a baby bat had been curled up inside her bra for five hours - as she was wearing it.
"Holy Bat-Tits, Batman!!!"........ ;D
Silly-A$$ed S**t........ ;D
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;D Holy Bat-Tits!!! I gotta try to remember that one.
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First wife had those.
Mac.
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From the book Waiting for White Horses by Nathan Jorgenson. Nathan is a dentist from
a community about 40 miles from us, and we have met him. He claims the hunting
stories in this book are all based on actual events in his life:
“That’s why they call it ‘hunting’ instead of ‘shooting.’ I guess the ducks win that
one,” Will said as he leaned back and unscrewed the lid from the second thermos of
coffee. He poured some coffee into the dented thermos top in his left hand. “Ducks or no
ducks, it’s good to be here.” Will spoke to no one in particular. He appeared completely
satisfied as he looked out over the lake and took a sip of coffee. A second later, he
convulsed forward and spat out the coffee. Coffee and curses sprayed from his mouth
like a shower. “This shit is really nasty! What the hell did you do to this stuff?” He was
spitting, trying to clear all the coffee from his mouth.
Initially, Grant thought it was just the usual criticism of his coffee, though maybe a
little overly dramatic. Will had an unpleasant look on his face, though, and Grant knew
soon enough that perhaps he wasn’t kidding. “It’s the same stuff we’ve been drinking.
You filled both thermoses from the big pot on the stove! Gimme a hit.”
Will made a point to throw the contents of his cup over the side of the boat.
“Probably kill the fish,” he mumbled. Then he filled the cup for Grant and passed it.
Grant sniffed at the cup and then furrowed his eyebrows slightly. He took a sip and
swished it around like mouthwash. He immediately lurched forward and spit it out on the
floor of the boat.
“Whoa! This stuff is kinda foul! Lemme see that thermos!” Grant took the thermos
from Will’s hand and began to pour the coffee onto the floor of the boat. The boat was
always strewn with dirt, swamp grass, candy wrappers, rainwater, and empty shotgun
shells; the coffee would make no difference. A stream of brown coffee ran from the
container. As the flow began to lessen, Grant flicked his wrist to raise the bottom of the
thermos above the top. As he moved his hand, something sped out of the bottle and
bumbled to the floor. It made a noise like a wet dishrag when it hit - “splat.” Nellie
jumbled back in surprise.
“AHHHH, SHIT! It’s a fuckin’ dead mouse!”
I can’t get ready to head out hunting a single morning with out visualizing this scene.
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Glad I'm done with my coffee :o
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First wife had those.
Mac.
Mine had witch's tits. ;D
Frank
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I can’t get ready to head out hunting a single morning with out visualizing this scene.
I'm sitting here snickering and for some reason I don't understand I keep looking at my coffee cup over and over. :)
No cream, no sugar, no rodents. :P