The Down Range Forum
Member Section => Down Range Cafe => Topic started by: jnevis on November 11, 2008, 07:37:31 AM
-
1. Pull up your droopy pants. You look like an idiot.
2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road". I drive a pickup truck because I need to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. They are horses, cattle, saw mills & oil wells. That's what they smell like to you. They smell like jobs to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-80 and go East and West, I-15 goes North and South. Pick one.
4. So you have a $60,000 dollar car. We're impressed. We have quarter-million dollar, air conditioned tractor that we drive 3 weeks a year.
5. So every person, in every pickup truck, waves. It's called being friendly, try to understand the concept.
6. If that cell phone rings while a flock of geese is coming in, we will shoot the phone out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear.
7. Yeah, we eat walleye & rainbow trout. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.
8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday, held the closest Sunday to the first of November.
9. In Wyoming, it is not trendy and is considered very, very unsafe to criticize the USA. God bless John Wayne, Elvis Presley, Audey Murphy, Cary Grant, Charlton Heston, and Jimmy Stewart but the rest of Hollywood
is not welcome here.
10. No, there is not a "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and Alpine Touch.
12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, & served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13. High School Football is as important here, as the Vikings and the Seattle Seahawks--And more fun to watch.
14. Colleges? Try University of wyoming,or a community college. They come out of there with an education--Plus a love for God and country.
15. We have a higher percentage of folks in the Navy, Army, Marines, & Air Force than any other state, so "Don't Mess with Wyoming." If you do, you will get your ass kicked.
16. Many of us are loggers, mill workers, ranchers & miners. For well over a century, we have helped supply beef for your tables, metals for cars, coal for electricity, wood for your homes & paper to wipe your sissy asses. Don't come here and tell us to stop working so you can remake the whole State into your own no-hunting park.
17. Remember, you came here because Wyoming is different. It will be kept that way. We don't need or want more shopping malls, housing developments or juice bars.
18. Don't try to use your imported money to re-make Wyoming into the image of where you just left. If you feel this need, go back home. And yes we do hate you for buying up all of our lake-front properties.
19. Above all, if you are a lawyer or anti-gun nut, just stay away. We are very aware of the fact that attorneys have created a major industry, out of lawsuits & babying criminals with guns. We are hunters and responsible gun lovers.
20. P.S.--Grizzlies are eagerly encouraged to eat out-of-staters.
-
Amen, Brother.
But I do believe it is I-25 that runs north and south - not sure where I-15 is. And don't really care.
-
I'm not from Wyoming, nor do I live there. However, a large part of my part of Kansas has a similar sentiment! It seems to be changing however. If it changes too much, do you have room for some of us non trendy meat eaters up there? ;) I know how to drive on gravel and wave at the same time!
-
I alas don't live up there but would like to (OK except for the snow)
There are a few other places like that, even here on the East Coast, hell even in CA. All is not lost YET.
-
I have in laws from Wyoming, good people, been to Glendo reservoir a couple of times to jet ski, truly a great place.
-
I'll swap you some slippery red Georgia clay roads for some of your gravel roads.
;D ;D ;D
-
Well said!!!!!
Richard
-
I believe #9 sums up a larger part of the country than a lot of people think....
I'm holding out for the Revolution, bringing up the Southern Flank.
-
I think you should add Tom Selleck to No. 9
It's called Kalifornication of the country, and it's not consentual.
I remember a few years ago some news story from Wyoming or Montana. The story was about all these Kalifornicators moving to the mountains and open places. They were interviewing some bimbo who had moved there from Kalifornia and was complaining about the grizzley bears in her area that were bothering her. She thought something should be done about them. I thought why did you move there in the first place. Either she should move back or the bear should eat her, but that would be cruel. To the BEAR.
-
I think you should add Tom Selleck to No. 9
It's called Kalifornication of the country, and it's not consentual.
I remember a few years ago some news story from Wyoming or Montana. The story was about all these Kalifornicators moving to the mountains and open places. They were interviewing some bimbo who had moved there from Kalifornia and was complaining about the grizzley bears in her area that were bothering her. She thought something should be done about them. I thought why did you move there in the first place. Either she should move back or the bear should eat her, but that would be cruel. To the BEAR.
The bear could injure himself when her boobs pop. :o
-
Tell it to the tools like Tom Brokaw! I hear he owns like half of Montana, now.
-
I think you should add Tom Selleck to No. 9
It's called Kalifornication of the country, and it's not consentual.
I remember a few years ago some news story from Wyoming or Montana. The story was about all these Kalifornicators moving to the mountains and open places. They were interviewing some bimbo who had moved there from Kalifornia and was complaining about the grizzley bears in her area that were bothering her. She thought something should be done about them. I thought why did you move there in the first place. Either she should move back or the bear should eat her, but that would be cruel. To the BEAR.
We had the same problem in Illinois when developments "in the country" starting popping up. Lady called animal control in hysterics because a coyote had just snagged her precious little fru-fru "Fluffy" and devoured it. The AC guy asked her what she wanted him to do, and she said "Come and kill the coyote!"> The AC guy allegedly told her "Lady, you moved into his neighborhood!"
Sounds right, I would like for it to be true.
-
You may think that there's no way to make the comparison, but here in my little seaside town in NJ the same thing is happening. We went from being a small seasonal town with 3 or 4 drug stores, 2 car dealerships, 3 grocery chains, 7 or 8 gas stations to being all condos, B&Bs, with one CVS, one food chain, and 90% of the homes owned as a second or third home by people who have a LOT more money than the natives.
I think it's happening everywhere. I just wonder where the hell do ALL these people get so much money?
-
Well if they have grizzlies there I'm not moving. I have no problem dealing with black bears that aren't much bigger than me, but grizzzlies scare me. Everything else about Wyoming sounds good. Montana too. Maybe even Idaho. Actually, any state that doesn't have a city like Detroit in it sounds pretty d*amned good!
-
Well if they have grizzlies there I'm not moving. I have no problem dealing with black bears that aren't much bigger than me, but grizzzlies scare me. Everything else about Wyoming sounds good. Montana too. Maybe even Idaho. Actually, any state that doesn't have a city like Detroit in it sounds pretty d*amned good!
JFrank,
Colorado. No grizzlies.
-
JFrank,
Colorado. No grizzlies.
Go west, young middle-aged man! :) Maybe, some day. It's just so hard to leave the great lakes behind.
-
Go west, young middle-aged man! :) Maybe, some day. It's just so hard to leave the great lakes behind.
Not that hard, I managed it. Besides, ain't nothing like sittin' a horse at 7 in the morning out in the middle of nowhere, gathering cows, hitchin the collar up to keep out the wind, listening to the creak of the leather, the breathing of the horse, and the mooing of the cows on a roundup. Golden eagles overhead, jackrabbits spookin everywhere.
Great life if you can handle it.
-
Not that hard, I managed it. Besides, ain't nothing like sittin' a horse at 7 in the morning out in the middle of nowhere, gathering cows, hitchin the collar up to keep out the wind, listening to the creak of the leather, the breathing of the horse, and the mooing of the cows on a roundup. Golden eagles overhead, jackrabbits spookin everywhere.
Great life if you can handle it.
Pathfinder, sounds like you have your piece of heaven here on earth! Your live'n my dream!!
Thanks for the vision. ;D
-
Anyone know of cheap land for sale?
I would like to get some land (TX, CO, NM, etc). What I am looking for....
Low cost (including yearly taxes).
Running water (stream or creek, maybe a lake or pond that doesn't dry up).
Good hunting.
Not unGodly cold in the winter (FL boy here ;D )
Don't really care how 'far from town' or anything else.
Some sort of access other than helicopter ;D
Yeah, I know....if you could find it you'd buy it yourself, but I had to ask!. ;)
-
Hazcat, we have plenty of that here. Only problem is that the Kalifornicators and Texans have driven the price of real estate pretty high.
Pathfinder, I hear you. Being up early, on your favorite horse hunting mule deer with a mist or snow coming down. Or just being out in the desert riding by yourself or with a sweet thing. Of course you have to have a flask of Crown Royal or tequila for warmth or snake bite or, well you get the picture.
-
I live in Colorado, I don't think you will find anyplace in this state that doesn't get unAllahly cold in the winter.