The Down Range Forum
Member Section => Prayer Requests => Topic started by: dj454 on September 17, 2009, 08:56:39 PM
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Hey guys I haven't been on here in a while because I have been dealing with my wife leaving me. I know some of you have been through it and know how hard it can be. I just haven't been myself and haven't felt like posting or even reading the forum. I have still been shooting and reloading for therapy but I miss my shooting partner. She decided she hadn't got to live enough since we married young and wants to see what else is out there. I tried to make it work but what can you do when your the only one who wants it to work. Remember me I will appreciate it. I was numb at first and just did things to try and cheer myself up. Bought guns went shooting every weekend spent a lot of money but here I am now and reality has set in and I am having a tough go of it. I know I can make it but when you lose someone you spent 10 years with it is hard. Especially under the circumstances. I was glad to see this new category. I definately need prayer. Thanks guys and ladies.
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Daniel, you have my (and I bet a lot of other) prayers. Yes, we have been where you are in some way, shape or form. You are not alone, if you need to talk, let me or anyone else know - PM us.
It sounds trite but you will get through this. Look to the Lord for guidance, and hang in there brother - you have a lot of friends here who want the best for you.
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My Ex picked the day before Christmas to tell me she wanted a divorce.
Do you have kids ? that makes it a awful lot harder.
Just remember, YOU WILL SURVIVE THIS.
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:(prayers are with ya dude.
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Will do. Sorry about your troubles
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A few days before my 31st birthday, I found out that my first wife was seeing one of my bosses. I was pretty shakin up and didn't know what to do for a long time. I kept feeling like I was supposed to wait and see if she wanted to work on it. Eventually, I got smart and made a decision for myself that it was time to move along. I took the dog, which made it a little easier, and decided I'd make better things happen.
I'm remarried and have 2 children. The ex never had children - she just turned 40 and had really had wanted to. She got her partying instead.
I'll be praying for you. Time really does make things easier. Good luck.
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Daniel I have been where you are. I went to my girlfriend's house with a ring in my pocket a year after I graduated college and after a bad fight. I wanted to apolgize and make things right and tell her how much I loved her only to have her stop me from saying a word before I could propose when she announced that she wanted to break up as she needed to "grow". I am ashamed to admit I was childish enough (and money foolish enough) to dump the ring on the table and walk out. Thing is, a few months later she showed up and gave me back the ring and apologized. We never got back toghther but have remained friends (with benefits) for almost twenty years. You have my support. Maybe you can reclaim at least the friend you had, maybe you can't, but either way remember, there's more pretty girls than one (to quote a country song and what the hell else would you quote when talking about divorce)? If you still love her don't let yourself get bitter. If you don't, don't let yourself get bitter. It is a major turnoff for future girfriends. Love her or don't, but move on, maybe she'll come back around, maybe she won't, either way YOU are responsible for making yourself happy now. Go find a woman who makes you laugh, not one that makes you horny. The last thing you need is a hormone fueled rebound. Find the girl that makes you laugh, makes you smile when she does something embarrasing and who you want to spend your time with. Screw looks and money. You are living in the real world with rest of us now. Find a real woman. My prayers are with you.
FQ13
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DJ,
Been there twice. It doesn't get easier.
But...
I can tell you you will 'get over' it. It isn't easy and it does hurt - but a little less each day.
We're here for ya, call any time ya want.
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DJ,
I too have been there. There is a reason for everything, and you will be stronger and better off in the long run.
As everyone has said, if you need to talk give me a pm anytime!
Take care.
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Know that I will be praying for you!
My dad left us when I was in high school, and I have had many friends go through this. I understand much, but never all, of what you are going through. The best I can tell you, beyond I will be praying, is that this is grief of the highest level. It is a very powerful separation you are going through. You need to feel the pain, accept the pain, work through the pain, and you will come out on the other side just fine. Any short cuts you take, namely drugs and alcohol, will only cripple you for years, and any attempts to avoid the pain will only delay it.
Let it hurt, heal well, and we will support you through prayer and anything else we can. Just let us know!
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dj, I too have been in your place a loooong time ago! You have been added to my prayer list. Wish I had had this support back then!
Richard
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Daniel
I want to stress something. This board is like a family. (more the Corleones than the Bradys, but still....). When folks offer their PM, as I am, they mean it. Its often a lot easier to talk to an anonymous stranger over the net than a friend or family member who's wrapped up in it. You want to vent with sympathetic folks who will give you honest advice and who you won't run into at work tomorrow? This is the place. PM one of us.
FQ13
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Good Grief, I actually agree with FQ twice in the same day ? Maybe I should see a Doctor. ;D
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I haven't been in your position, Daniel, but what these other folks have said sounds like pretty good advice.
What I can offer is sincere prayers for you to get through this (and I know you will) and an open PM box.
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DJ, or Daniel, we share a common bond, we both have Our 1st names on the forum, there are a few others, but that makes us bonded.
The 1st thing is Loss, an empty place that something or someone use to take up in our minds, and daily routines, and it is real, what needs to happen now is to replace it, not easy at all, but it can and will happen if you let it and go through the motions of normal life long enough.
God is one example, a new woman is another, hard work can help, but you need something that mimics what you lost, or has as much importance in YOUR mind.
An empty place in your heart is hard to fill, I know, My mother passed early at 60, and I'm not over it yet, and that is 9 yrs ago.
My wife nearly died, and after recovery is not near the woman I had, but we move on, and ACCEPT, what happened, she is still here but not the same person, thank God, she survived, but We as a couple, are not the same. That was 4 yrs ago.
Long story short, Accept it, refill it, and move on.
God bless and as others here have told you, Don't replace with alcohol or drugs, that is easy and that is what I did, it don't work in the long run.
I do feel your pain, and don't hesitate to PM any of us.
Best to you my friend.
Benny ;D
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Thanks guys I really appreciate it. Don't worry about the drugs or alcohol I don't indulge never have. Just reading the comments and knowing someone is praying helps more than you know. Funny how it works out I posted this and ended up making a new friend close to were I live. We clicked right away and we are going to meet in person today for the first time. She said the same thing I was feeling that she needed an unbiased friend to talk to. I don't know where it will lead but we have become friends quite quickly. We both make each other laugh. Might be the start of a beautiful friendship. Thanks guys I am feeling good at the moment but I know I have some hard times to come. So thanks for the continued support.
Daniel
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I feel for you,....heck I feel for all of you who have had to deal with this.
Prayer is a powerful tool to petition an Almighty God on our behalf.
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Daniel, you just keep your head up, and know that you are not alone. Find a way to see the end of the tunnel, not the dark tunnel itself.
You will get through this.
I went through the exact thing you are dealing with, but went even farther into a dark place, I isolated myself, was mad at the world, and got involved in a self destructive pattern it took my son to snap me out of.
"And the people, when they knew it, followed him: and he
received them, and spoke unto them of the kingdom of God, and
healed them that had need of healing."
LUKE 9:11
With a verse as poignant as 9:11, in regards to healing, please contact any of us here at DRTV, at anytime. I hope and pray things get better for you soon.
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I've felt your pain, Daniel. It helped then to remember what my dad once told me during a time of stress: "This, too shall pass." It did. Be strong, friend.