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Author Topic: Classic joke thread...  (Read 1368398 times)

MikeBjerum

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1250 on: December 21, 2008, 12:17:00 PM »
Why can a lawyer go swimming in shark infested waters with no fear of attack?

Professional courtesy!
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PegLeg45

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1251 on: December 21, 2008, 12:33:51 PM »
What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?

One's a 'scum-sucking bottom-feeder' and the other one's a fish.

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Pathfinder

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1252 on: December 21, 2008, 12:48:29 PM »
What are 300 lawyers chained to the bottom of Lake Michigan.




















Just a start.
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tt11758

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1253 on: December 21, 2008, 06:52:51 PM »
Q:  Why do lawyers wear neckties?

A:  To keep the foreskin from rolling up over their heads.



Q:  When you find 6 lawyers buried up to their necks in cement, what time is it?

A:  Time for more cement.



Q:  What do lawyers use for birth control?

A:  Their personalities.
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TAB

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1254 on: December 21, 2008, 07:07:47 PM »
Q: What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
        A: Skeet.

   A truck driver used to amuse himself by running over lawyers he saw walking down the side of the road. Every time he saw a lawyer walking along the road, he swerved to hit him and there would be a loud "THUMP". Then he would swerve back on the road.
        One day, as the truck driver was driving along the road he saw a priest hitchhiking. He thought he would do a good deed and pulled the truck over.
        "Where are you going, Father?" The truck driver asked.
        "I'm going to the church 5 miles down the road," replied the priest.
        "No problem, Father! I'll give you a lift. Climb in the truck." The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. Suddenly, the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road.
        Instinctively he swerved to hit him. At the last moment he remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so he swerved back to the road and narrowly missed the lawyer.
        Certain he should've missed the lawyer, the truck driver was very surprised and immediately uneasy when he heard a loud "THUMP". He felt really guilty about his actions and so turned to the priest and said, "I'm really sorry Father. I almost hit that lawyer."
        "That's okay," replied the priest. "I got him with the door."



 
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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1255 on: Today at 05:18:40 PM »
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1255 on: December 23, 2008, 01:27:17 AM »
My nuts are freezing.
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Pathfinder

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1256 on: December 23, 2008, 04:18:14 AM »
Quote from: jumbofrank on December 23, 2008, 01:27:17 AM
My nuts are freezing.

Thanks for sharing . . . .
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philw

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1257 on: December 23, 2008, 07:42:36 AM »
Quote from: jumbofrank on December 23, 2008, 01:27:17 AM
My nuts are freezing.



wow  something I did not need to know


I will sit back here with our 32 deg   today


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Hazcat

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1258 on: December 23, 2008, 07:46:45 AM »
Quote from: philw on December 23, 2008, 07:42:36 AM


wow  something I did not need to know


I will sit back here with our 32 deg   today




0845 and 55 on its way to 75    ;D
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MikeBjerum

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1259 on: December 23, 2008, 07:53:17 AM »
Heat wave today and it will be a light jacket day ... 0750 and it is 11 on its way to 18!
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