We need to form our own HOA in a gated community. I know I would feel much safer with you guys around instead of halfway across the country in every direction. The BG's would have a seriously hard time boosting anything in our neighborhood, that's for sure.
FQ has to stay in the gatehouse with his Sportical! <cough - cannon fodder - cough>.
Gates? We don't need no steenkin' gates!!!Minimum residence requirements:
Two handguns per occupant and at least one must be a 1911 suitable for shower wear;
One shotgun per occupant with at least one being a 12 ga;
One politically incorrect rifle per occupant with at least one being a .30 caliber
Knives, flashlights and canes as wished;
Outdoor channel in every cable package;
Autographed photo of Pincus and Janich on every refrigerator;
The Best Defense and
The Best Defense: Survival DVD collection in every home theater;
Roof top landing lights for the blond chick on her broom and flight of flying monkeys;
And one gas powered Hazaritta blender next to the hot tub and fire pit.