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Author Topic: Classic joke thread...  (Read 1367066 times)

Jim Kennedy-ar154me

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5820 on: March 18, 2024, 11:50:33 AM »
An elderly man rear-ended a guy driving an expensive European sports car. Enraged, the guy hops out and confronts the old man.

He yells, "Look what you did to my car! You're going to give me $10,000 right now or I'm going to beat you to a pulp!"

"Oh my…" the old man said nervously. "I don't have that kind of money. Let me call my son,” he said with hope. “He trains dolphins and he will know what to do."

"Dolphins!" the other driver huffed while rolling his eyes.
The old man pulled out his phone, dialed his son, and just as his son answered, the irate man snatched the phone away from the old man.

"So, YOU'RE a dolphin trainer, huh?” The irate man yelled, “Well, your old man here just rear-ended my car and I need TEN GRAND right now, or I'm going to beat you AND your old man to a pulp!". "I'll be there in 10 minutes." says the voice calmly on the other end.

Exactly 10 minutes later, a Jeep pulls up and a guy hops out and proceeds to pulverize the bully, leaving him in a heap on the side of the road. When he finished, he walked over to his father and said, "For the last time Dad, I train Seals… Navy Seals. NOT dolphins!”
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5821 on: March 18, 2024, 02:43:27 PM »
Quote from: Jim Kennedy-ar154me on March 18, 2024, 09:39:35 AM
Trying to post joke. I hope this works.

 ;D ;D ;D
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5822 on: March 18, 2024, 09:49:38 PM »
Hey ladies, looking for Fun, Frank, & Love? Find a Frank of your very own with Frank Finder.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Jim Kennedy-ar154me

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5823 on: March 19, 2024, 10:46:24 AM »
Works for me!
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Jim Kennedy-ar154me

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5824 on: March 19, 2024, 11:13:06 AM »
They need this in the White House.
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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5825 on: Today at 12:58:24 AM »
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Jim Kennedy-ar154me

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5825 on: March 19, 2024, 11:16:51 AM »
Does your wife drive one of these?
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Jim Kennedy-ar154me

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5826 on: March 19, 2024, 12:16:35 PM »
LAst one for a while.
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5827 on: March 19, 2024, 07:02:25 PM »
Quote from: Jim Kennedy-ar154me on March 19, 2024, 11:16:51 AM
Does your wife drive one of these?

That's the only one my ex didn't blow the engine on from lack of maintenance.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5828 on: March 19, 2024, 07:08:12 PM »
 ;D
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5829 on: March 21, 2024, 12:03:34 AM »
This is why you must choose your words carefully. ::)
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher
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