Well, I cannot comment specifically about other forums, they all have a different approaches when it comes to rules and moderation guidelines.
Deleting posts can also be a server and space issue. Big forums with lots of traffic and lots of posts in the database, can slow the forums down if the server is not up for the task.
Marshal'ette and I have been running forums for years. I started doing it 13 years ago.
Our job is to be the hosts, but sometimes you have to be the middleman between members who simply can't go along and are not able to agree to disagree and move on. On the Internet, this can be irritating and noisy for other members even when you have the option of completely ignoring it.
Forums are also a playground for people who can play out a different personality, which means he or she is not the same person you get to know face to face. A few change their attitude completely when they have a keyboard and a screen as a communication tool. I have personally met people on the road that I have known for years through the Internet, emails and forums. Some are exactly the way I pictured them, others..... well... they aren't.
I know a lot of people on this forum communicate outside the forum boundaries and have become good friends. This type of combined communication helps create a more human forum environment and not just a cold cyberspace with no body language and no chemistry.
Our job is to give some friendly advice when needed if things turn bad, but for the most part it is about taking care of members as if they were guests in our home. At least, that is the way we look at it.
Bottom line is that we as hosts can be just that - but without a bunch of members like we are so fortunate to have here, the DRTV forum will just be another cold place in cyberspace.
Thanks.