Good Old sayings LOST

[Green Mountain Gringo]

He's number than a pound of Hake.

Number than a pounded thumb.

He don't know sh!t from Shinola

(When you made a mistake and said "I thought...")  You know what Thought thought don't ya? He thought rat sh!t was raisins until he ate some.

You'll put your eye out with that stick.

[Hazcat]

I'll stick my boot so far up yer arse yer breath will smell like kiwi.

If I want any sh!t outta you I'll rip yer head off and pour it out.

Feelin' froggy?  Well I got FLZ tatooed on my chest, go ahead and jump, punk!

The best part of you ran down yer mothers' leg.

(Can ya tell I was a Drill Sergeant?  )

[shooter32]

Ya can't run with the big dogs, when ya pee like a puppy.      Baxter Black

Drier than a popcorn fart.

That boy's like a fart in a hot skillet.

You got another thing coming!!!       

Boy you got a long row to hoe.

Bottom 4 from my grandpa 

[philw]

fits like a finger in a arse!

put your thumb in your arse and your mind in neutral

Wouldn't Touch Her with a Forty Foot Barge Pole... or Your Dick.

So Friggin Ugly you have put two bags over her head in case one broke....

Beauty is only a light switch away

He's got a few roos loose in the top paddock.

A few wanks short of an orgasm.

Built like a brick shithouse.

Up at a sparrows fart.

I'm not pissing in your pocket mate!

Not enough brains to give 'imself a headache!

You must be the world's only living brain donor.

Got you by the short and curlies.

Busier than a one armed Sydney cab driver with the crabs.

Got a face like a bashed in shit can.

Wouldn't know if his arse was on fire.

You couldn't drive a fart out of your own arse!

Drilling for Vegemite.

He's having a Barry Crocker

f..k you and the horse you rode on!

Happy as a pig in shit.

I'll have your guts for garters mate!

It's as full as a prostitute on a Saturday night.


Give birth to a politician.

[tombogan03884]

 Busier than a fire eater with a paper asshole.

[Sponsor]

[tt11758]

Busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest

Busier than a one-armed wallpaper hanger

If brains were dynamite he couldn't blow a pissant around a b-b.

If it cost a nickel to shit I couldn't afford to fart.

If brains were dynamite he couldn't blow his nose.

If bullshit was gold he'd be a millionaire.

I'm gonna kick your ass clear up between your shoulders.

I'm gonna kick you in the ass so hard you'll have to pull down your socks to pee.

How would you like to wear your ass for a hat?

I'm gonna beat you until you can't grow anymore.

Dumber than dog shit.

Uglier than homemade shit.



And my dad's favorite line................

..................."C'mere and pull my finger!"                   

[deepwater]

one from dear ol' ma;

slicker than greased goose shit!

and of course, oil field humor,  ;

busier than a three legged cat coverin' up shit!

humped up like a halloween kitty

[Hazcat]

Slicker 'en snot on a pump handle.

[Kid Shelleen]

It's so cold, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

I'm too poor to pay attention.

More nervous than a whore in church.

She's so ugly, if you threw a can of Alpo (Dinky Dog, Phil) in the air, it would never hit the ground.

My wife prefers 68. She says, "You do me and I'll owe you one."

Finer than frog's hair.

I brought you into this world and I can take you out.

I'm too pooped to pop.

[tt11758]

Slicker 'en snot on a pump handle.

Slicker 'en (Haz)cat shit on a linoleum floor.