Classic joke thread...

[tombogan03884]

There once was a chic named Magill
Who took an atomic energy pill
They found her vagina in North Carolina
And her tit's wound up in Brazil.

[tt11758]

There once was a chic named Magill
Who took an atomic energy pill
They found her vagina in North Carolina
And her tit's wound up in Brazil.

Ya just KNOW that Red and Teresa are gonna find a way to see that as sick. 

[tombogan03884]

Ya just KNOW that Red and Teresa are gonna find a way to see that as sick. 

I'll just refer you to Steve Cover's earlier post. 

It Figures

Steve

[lhprop1]

There once was a chic named Magill
Who took an atomic energy pill
They found her vagina in North Carolina
And her tit's wound up in Brazil.

Going the limerick route, are we?

And Afghan shepherd named Bruno
Said f*cking is one thing I do know
The young boys are fine
And sheep are divine
But goats are numero uno

[tombogan03884]

Going the limerick route, are we?

And Afghan shepherd named Bruno
Said f*cking is one thing I do know
The young boys are fine
And sheep are divine
But goats are numero uno

You're going to hell for that.
I'll bring the hot dogs.   

[Sponsor]

[lhprop1]

You're going to hell for that.
I'll bring the hot dogs.   

That would be far down on the list of offenses.  You can't play rugby for almost 20 years and not come away without being a veritable encyclopedia of dirty songs. 

[tombogan03884]

That would be far down on the list of offenses.  You can't play rugby for almost 20 years and not come away without being a veritable encyclopedia of dirty songs. 

Don't try blaming it on the Aussie's.
They'll just say "To f**iking right mate, pass me another Cooper's".   

[santahog]

Going the limerick route, are we?

Clean one, anyone?

There once was a man named Macgill
who ran up and down a steep hill.
When a woman inquired, "Don't you ever get tired?"
He said "Nah"..

[tombogan03884]

Clean one, anyone?

There once was a man named Macgill
who ran up and down a steep hill.
When a woman inquired, "Don't you ever get tired?"
He said "Nah"..

That's nice, I now return you to our usual standards.


Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators during the Athens Summer Olympics that they would like to take back:
 
1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
 
2. Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
 
3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
 
4. Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."
 
5. Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."
 
6. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."
 
7. At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."
 
8. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
 
9. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God, what have I just said?"

[PegLeg45]

That's nice, I now return you to our usual standards.


Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators during the Athens Summer Olympics that they would like to take back:
 
1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
 
2. Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
 
3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
 
4. Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."
 
5. Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."
 
6. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."
 
7. At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."
 
8. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
 
9. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God, what have I just said?"

Now that is good stuff.....