The Down Range Forum
Member Section => Down Range Cafe => Topic started by: TAB on April 02, 2011, 01:36:37 AM
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As some of you know I have a PITA that lives two doors down... you know the kind, will call code enforcment, parking patrol... blah blah.
Well her latest bitch is the sign I have in my front yard with my companys name and info on it. you know they are the small vinyl signs that contractors often use to advertise thier work. they are 18x24 inchs and have a wire frame. Its very plan jane, white base, black lettering... it also have all the info required by law.
On tuesday, she called code enforcment on it... well being a former contractor I know I can legally leave the sign up for 60 days. It had been less then a week. So I have talked around the hood and guess what.
There are now 23 signs on the street. 5 to the west of her, 7 to the east and 11 of 13 across the street. ;D
seems every one thinks shes a horses ass. what a shock.
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Good one TAB. Sweet revenge. 8)
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So at the end of 60 days, find nother sympathetic contractors, and replace your signs with theirs.
For two months it's roofing, for 2 months it's general contract, for 2 months is tile and carpet, for 2 months it's plumbing/electrical, then home security and heat/air. You could keep this up for a year easy.
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Why would you call that revenge? Out of neighborly concern you are helping her address deep seated psychological issues by introducing a measured dose of therapy. Medicine sometimes "tastes bad", but is medicine none-the-less. You are helping someone get well.
That would make you a good neighbor.
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So at the end of 60 days, find nother sympathetic contractors, and replace your signs with theirs.
For two months it's roofing, for 2 months it's general contract, for 2 months is tile and carpet, for 2 months it's plumbing/electrical, then home security and heat/air. You could keep this up for a year easy.
All ya really need is two sets. Switch them out every 60 days. ;)
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In the spirit of being a good neighbor I hope you didn't exclude her! Did you ask if you could put one in her yard ;D
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In the spirit of being a good neighbor I hope you didn't exclude her! Did you ask if you could put one in her yard ;D
I love it!!! haha
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Why would you call that revenge? Out of neighborly concern you are helping her address deep seated psychological issues by introducing a measured dose of therapy. Medicine sometimes "tastes bad", but is medicine none-the-less. You are helping someone get well.
That would make you a good neighbor.
Rastus, I don't want to argue theology with you, but I don't think this what the Bible means by "Loving your neighbor as yourself". It does sound good though. ;D
FQ13
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Good one TAB!!! :D :D
If the code allows, just take them down at the end of 60 days, wait a week and put them right back up for 60 more. If that isn't allowed, then do like others have mentioned and use different signs.
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In the spirit of being a good neighbor I hope you didn't exclude her! Did you ask if you could put one in her yard ;D
you know it was very, very hard for me to not plant one in her yard...
Peg can't do that. legally I have to be either working on the house or have just completed work on the house. So they all got a energy audit that said if they swap out one light bubl for a cfl they would save $.005 a hour vs a 100 wat light bulb. I'm sure my partner is going to see the invoices and go WTF. I'll get a call, explain every thing and he will crack up. lol
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Rastus, I don't want to argue theology with you, but I don't think this what the Bible means by "Loving your neighbor as yourself". It does sound good though. ;D
FQ13
Seems valid to me.
But then I've also counseled folks about revenge.
If you are wronged, the person who wronged you will suffer in the after life for that wrong. Unless they atone for that wrong in the present, their suffering will be prolonged and harder to endure.
By not helping them to atone in this life, you are knowingly condemning them to much greater suffering in the after life.
I know you might be tempted to smile and enjoy the thought of them suffering greatly, but do the right thing by them and do what ever you can to help them atone for their wrongs in this life. Preferably with a solid alibi.
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you know it was very, very hard for me to not plant one in her yard...
Peg can't do that. legally I have to be either working on the house or have just completed work on the house. So they all got a energy audit that said if they swap out one light bubl for a cfl they would save $.005 a hour vs a 100 wat light bulb. I'm sure my partner is going to see the invoices and go WTF. I'll get a call, explain every thing and he will crack up. lol
Well, it was worth a shot. ;D ;D
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The 1st day I met this lady I knew she was going to be a PITA.
I was moving in, had about 20 people over to help unload the truck. you know some family and friends. the street was packed with cars. anyways the truck gets unloaded in about 1 hour, then we are in the back yard having a party. Hole hog in a pit, god knows how much beer in a dozen or so coolers. sides up the wazu. I'm going door to door to invite people over. She never answered her door. About 2 hours go by, its now about 4 pm on a sat, there are 60-80 people in the back yard, every one is having a good time, the hog has been out about 20 mins. here comes this lady to the front door and says we need to keep the noise down and she is going to call parking partol on all the cars. I'm assuming some one has her blocked in or something. Nope, she just didn't like all the cars parked infront of her house. This lady is just a real bitch.
I've gotton several parking tickets from her calling parking patrol, she also made me mov my container which was on the side yard and not vizable from the street unless you litterly looked over the block wall fence. Code enforcment about my boats, and my dump trailer in the drive way full of stuff when I was remodeling the bathroom. Several noise complains about me building stuff in the garage, every single one the SD has come up to me and said, your fine, this lady calls all the time. The list goes on and on.
she is just a horses ass.
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Her life is pitiful if she can't find a better use of her time.
My neighbor called the cops on me a dozen times telling them I shot up his house with paintballs. It turned out to be bird droppings and he thought it was paint. This is the same a-hole who assaulted me and almost broke my neck. Sometimes I stay awake at night thinking of ways I could torture him if I knew I could get away with it. :(
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Her life is pitiful if she can't find a better use of her time.
My neighbor called the cops on me a dozen times telling them I shot up his house with paintballs. It turned out to be bird droppings and he thought it was paint. This is the same a-hole who assaulted me and almost broke my neck. Sometimes I stay awake at night thinking of ways I could torture him if I knew I could get away with it. :(
If he assaulted you, why didn't you call the cops? Not a critique, just a question. I let a guy slide because my mom had to live down the block from him and she didn't want him to do his thirty days and come looking for payback. I did as she asked, but it doesn't sit right because these guys escalate. Just curious about your story. If its private, no worries.
FQ13
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Seems valid to me.
But then I've also counseled folks about revenge.
If you are wronged, the person who wronged you will suffer in the after life for that wrong. Unless they atone for that wrong in the present, their suffering will be prolonged and harder to endure.
By not helping them to atone in this life, you are knowingly condemning them to much greater suffering in the after life.
I know you might be tempted to smile and enjoy the thought of them suffering greatly, but do the right thing by them and do what ever you can to help them atone for their wrongs in this life. Preferably with a solid alibi.
Then you can actually watch them suffer greatly in this life. ;D
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Her life is pitiful if she can't find a better use of her time.
My neighbor called the cops on me a dozen times telling them I shot up his house with paintballs. It turned out to be bird droppings and he thought it was paint. This is the same a-hole who assaulted me and almost broke my neck. Sometimes I stay awake at night thinking of ways I could torture him if I knew I could get away with it. :(
Wood putty in his keyholes.
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Then you can actually watch them suffer greatly in this life. ;D
It's the only Goodly thing to do.
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Sometimes I stay awake at night thinking of ways I could torture him if I knew I could get away with it. :(
Wood putty in his keyholes.
Deer piss from the sporting goods section at wally world........ when squirted on a cotton ball and poked into an obscure place on his car (like down into the trunk, if he drives a car) with a coat hanger works wonders. Sardine juice works well too.
;)
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You are bringing me back to my high school days Peg. ;) WE had a chem teacher mamed Mr. Ano, who had wandering eyes towards the teeanage girls in his class (and no I'm not making that up) ;D. We waxed his car for him, we just didn't buff it. We called him at 5 am and informed him him he might want to get on that before the sun baked it on. We are going straight to hell, but the image of that perv sweating to buff three cans of tutrle wax? Priceless. ;)
FQ13 who seriously holds a grudge against 50 year olds who coment on my girlfriend's ass
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You are bringing me back to my high school days Peg. ;) WE had a chem teacher mamed Mr. Ano, who had wandering eyes towards the teeanage girls in his class (and no I'm not making that up) ;D. We waxed his car for him, we just didn't buff it. We called him at 5 am and informed him him he might want to get on that before the sun baked it on. We are going straight to hell, but the image of that perv sweating to buff three cans of tutrle wax? Priceless. ;)
FQ13 who seriously holds a grudge against 50 year olds who coment on my girlfriend's ass
Similar thing happened when I was in high school also.......except they wrote "perv" on the hood and trunk of his car with vaseline. This was back before clear-coat finishing, when most auto paint was still enamel that was more porous than today, so it soaked in gooooooood. No matter how many times he had it cleaned and detailed, after a day of sitting in the sun, all it took was a light coat of pollen or south Georgia dust to magically reappear.
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If he assaulted you, why didn't you call the cops? Not a critique, just a question. I let a guy slide because my mom had to live down the block from him and she didn't want him to do his thirty days and come looking for payback. I did as she asked, but it doesn't sit right because these guys escalate. Just curious about your story. If its private, no worries.
FQ13
I called the cops. Two days later they came and took a report. He plea bargained, got probation and still has a clean record. How's that for justice? BTW, I never laid a finger on him, but I may have to shoot him some day.
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You are bringing me back to my high school days Peg. ;) WE had a chem teacher mamed Mr. Ano, who had wandering eyes towards the teeanage girls in his class (and no I'm not making that up) ;D. We waxed his car for him, we just didn't buff it. We called him at 5 am and informed him him he might want to get on that before the sun baked it on. We are going straight to hell, but the image of that perv sweating to buff three cans of tutrle wax? Priceless. ;)
FQ13 who seriously holds a grudge against 50 year olds who coment on my girlfriend's ass
Had a 9th grade wood shop teacher, Mr. Nichols, who often verbally expressed his contempt for students as thieving worthless scum. His actions confirmed his disregard for us.
I was making a "Ships Ladder" set of book shelves for my mother. After cutting and shaping and hours of sanding the project I cam in to find it covered in over spray from Mr. Nichols personal project.
It became my fervent goal to make that man pay.
Another student in my first period class, Dick Wheelwright, was complaining to me about a similar grievance and I told him I'd tell him how to get even if he swore he would NEVER mention it was us who did the deed.
Every morning Mr. Nichols make a big deal of unlocking all of the tool cabinets, snapping the pad locks onto the open hasp. He would tell us that he had to lock up the cabinets each day because us thieving students would break in and steal them over night. He also emphasized that he had to snap the locks on the hasps to prevent us from stealing them.
Told Dick about using the wood putty, which he did. Also told him to be at my locker at the end of the day since it was at the entrance to the wood shop and had a good view into it.
That afternoon, we were treated to witnessing Mr. Nichols ranting in the shop in a rage about his locks and the cabinets being unlocked over night.
The next day in class, he rage continued, saying he had to spend the night in the shop to protect the tools. He also promised the ones responsible would be found and would pay. Never happened.
At our 10th year HS reunion, Dick sat down with me and brought up the crime. He said he had never spoken of our deed until just then with me. I had done the same. We decided that our risk was over and agreed that the story was declassified.
I was not finished with Mr. Nichols however.
He often spoke of his pot of animal glue. I was contained in a heated pot, maybe about a quart size. He said he filled the pot with glue on his first day of teaching shop and has never let it run out, just adding more glue as needed. He said that if any of us had the intelligence to understand such things, we would know that some of the molecules of glue from his initial filling of the pot were still present after all these years of teaching.
This pot of glue was treasured by him. So, one day I had gathered all the sawdust I could in the shop and before the end of my period, I filled the pot with the sawdust. It still looked fine afterwards, but he turned it off each evening and back on the next morning to melt the glue.
The next day when he turned it on, it remained a solid block of wood.
I was there when he realized the link to his first day of teaching had been destroyed. He wept. He showed no anger, just great sorrow.
I knew I had taken one of the most valuable parts of his life from him. I learned that revenge is not always sweet.
I still wonder if, knowing the sorrow it would cause him, I would still do the same. I think I would. He caused a lot of pain to a lot of students, and even though their pain was less deep, there were years of it happening.
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Great job TAB. Some of the tricks are pretty thoughtful on this thread.
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The 1st day I met this lady I knew she was going to be a PITA.
I was moving in, had about 20 people over to help unload the truck. you know some family and friends. the street was packed with cars. anyways the truck gets unloaded in about 1 hour, then we are in the back yard having a party. Hole hog in a pit, god knows how much beer in a dozen or so coolers. sides up the wazu. I'm going door to door to invite people over. She never answered her door. About 2 hours go by, its now about 4 pm on a sat, there are 60-80 people in the back yard, every one is having a good time, the hog has been out about 20 mins. here comes this lady to the front door and says we need to keep the noise down and she is going to call parking partol on all the cars. I'm assuming some one has her blocked in or something. Nope, she just didn't like all the cars parked infront of her house. This lady is just a real bitch.
I've gotton several parking tickets from her calling parking patrol, she also made me mov my container which was on the side yard and not vizable from the street unless you litterly looked over the block wall fence. Code enforcment about my boats, and my dump trailer in the drive way full of stuff when I was remodeling the bathroom. Several noise complains about me building stuff in the garage, every single one the SD has come up to me and said, your fine, this lady calls all the time. The list goes on and on.
she is just a horses ass.
I only have one reccomendation, well two but I reccomend a paintbrush on a pole and a can of really good weedkiller and paint something particular to her mindset on her lawn and just wait for the lawn to start dying back ;D
Also join up to a dating site through a proxy server to hide your IP address, create a fake email (hotmail or similar) and take out an advertisment with her details something like hot bitch looking for swinger partner and give her postal address and phone number as a contact.
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Just have FQ mail her an Iguana.
Live of course. ;D
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I only have one reccomendation, well two but I reccomend a paintbrush on a pole and a can of really good weedkiller and paint something particular to her mindset on her lawn and just wait for the lawn to start dying back ;D
Also join up to a dating site through a proxy server to hide your IP address, create a fake email (hotmail or similar) and take out an advertisment with her details something like hot bitch looking for swinger partner and give her postal address and phone number as a contact.
A one gallon sprayer of salt water will do the trick also.
A friend in high school had a project for extra credit in a particular class. The teacher was an asshole, much like the one Solus described. When my friend went to turn in the two-week-long project results, the teacher said he had "changed his mind" and wouldn't accept the report. That weekend, my friend took two cans of Morton's salt and wrote the word "asshole" in the guys front yard. All was well until the next rain/lawn watering and then amazingly, there it was, in big letters that could be easily read from the street. It took a while for it to grow back in also.
*As a side note, radiator fluid will do the same thing (and the grass will not come back for years) but is too toxic to the environment to use for this purpose. I accidentally found out while changing a thermostat on my truck and unintentionally spilled a little in my yard. It took over two years for that spot to get grass back, even with reseeding.
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A one gallon sprayer of salt water will do the trick also.
A friend in high school had a project for extra credit in a particular class. The teacher was an asshole, much like the one Solus described. When my friend went to turn in the two-week-long project results, the teacher said he had "changed his mind" and wouldn't accept the report. That weekend, my friend took two cans of Morton's salt and wrote the word "asshole" in the guys front yard. All was well until the next rain/lawn watering and then amazingly, there it was, in big letters that could be easily read from the street. It took a while for it to grow back in also.
*As a side note, radiator fluid will do the same thing (and the grass will not come back for years) but is too toxic to the environment to use for this purpose. I accidentally found out while changing a thermostat on my truck and unintentionally spilled a little in my yard. It took over two years for that spot to get grass back, even with reseeding.
Sounds perfect to me ::)
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I must have gone to the wrong schools. Most of our teachers were pretty decent, and the ones who weren't tended to err on the side of jock-love, i.e., if you played sports, you got an A.
Had 1 teacher, Mr. Avis, great guy, family friend, taught Chemistry. And regularly blew up the lab. When I was his student (although not in the class), he dropped a rather large chuck of metallic sodium into about 2 liters of water in a glass beaker. For the uninitiated, that action produces a rather significant exothermic reaction. In other words, it blows the f..k up! The room was a combined lab and classroom, with space allocated for both. He was at one end, glass was found embedded in the storage door at the opposite end of the space. No one was hurt, but there was a quite large scorch mark on the ceiling right above where the glass beaker was.
Our problem were not the teachers so much as it was the JDs - think American Graffiti - who would steal anything not nailed down. One of the knuckle draggers took a world history book, back when they taught such things, that had a picture of the Aztec sun dial on it. Said KD decided in shop class it would be cool to use the drill press to punch a hole in each of the points on the sun dial. Which he did. I don't think his parents thought it was cool paying for that book.
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I must have gone to the wrong schools. Most of our teachers were pretty decent, and the ones who weren't tended to err on the side of jock-love, i.e., if you played sports, you got an A.
I guess I should, with due respect to most of my teachers, clarify that the two teachers I commented about were really the only examples, in our high school, of how a teacher should not be.....and were not the norm. I had many really decent teachers and was fortunate to go to school at a time when a student could still receive a quality education (I guess, using myself as an example, that may be debatable ;D ).
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I must have gone to the wrong schools. Most of our teachers were pretty decent, and the ones who weren't tended to err on the side of jock-love, i.e., if you played sports, you got an A.
Had 1 teacher, Mr. Avis, great guy, family friend, taught Chemistry. And regularly blew up the lab. When I was his student (although not in the class), he dropped a rather large chuck of metallic sodium into about 2 liters of water in a glass beaker. For the uninitiated, that action produces a rather significant exothermic reaction. In other words, it blows the f..k up! The room was a combined lab and classroom, with space allocated for both. He was at one end, glass was found embedded in the storage door at the opposite end of the space. No one was hurt, but there was a quite large scorch mark on the ceiling right above where the glass beaker was.
Our problem were not the teachers so much as it was the JDs - think American Graffiti - who would steal anything not nailed down. One of the knuckle draggers took a world history book, back when they taught such things, that had a picture of the Aztec sun dial on it. Said KD decided in shop class it would be cool to use the drill press to punch a hole in each of the points on the sun dial. Which he did. I don't think his parents thought it was cool paying for that book.
We must have had the same teacher "coach" who managed to drop it in his fish tank. Big boom, no one hurt, but it was sad to see a grown man cry over many hundreds of dollars of salt water fish meet an untimely end. (His baby moray survived as we got it in a bucket fast enough). Extra credit to the academic games team for once, and it only took one bite. But hey, it was a cool eel. Beat the hell out of most of the jocks. ;D
FQ13
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ok, so my biz partner saw the invoices today, I of corse got the WTF call.
I told him what went down, his reply "lets send her a Ad letter, with a discount coupon"
;D
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Years ago I was working for a couple. Wife was very nice and some kind of bank executive. Guy was a douchebag and I have never seen anyone berate a woman like this guy. I wanted to hit him several times, but instead walked out. They finally asked me why I'd just walk out when we were talking about the job and I said, "Because I can't stand there and listen to that crap- I can't believe she hasn't left you or killed you by now". They later go marriage counseling because of our conversations.
The best was, though...friday afternoon, 5 pm and almost out the door, she was going away but HE was going to camp out at the place for the weekend. Earlier in the day one of my guys was under the house and said, "it's full of black widows". I'm like, "Right- you just don't want to be down there". I had only seen about 4 BWs in 18 years of building. He kept insisting so I went down there and DAMN!- never ever saw anything like it. It was a maze of nests and all the little ones had hatched- MILLIONS OF THEM!!
So later (at 5) he's staying, she leaves, and I say, "I'll be back monday. Oh....by the way...the crawlspace is full of black widows". Walked right out after that. Smiling.
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TAB is getting the best revenge right here here.
People all over the world are laughing AT this miserable bat.
She's one of those miserable (probably liberal ) A Holes who just can't be happy if no one else is PO'd around her, and here we are yucking it up at her expense. The laughter generated by some of the stories she has brought out is probably adding years to OUR lives, mean while, she just gets older.
Only way it could be better is if she read this thread to see what a trivial ass people really think she is.
Remember the military 80,000 Cubic foot Smoke grenades ? the ones that left colored soot on EVERYTHING.
I think a nice purple, or yellow in her back yard some warm day when her windows are all open. ;D
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Been a long time ago, and I don't know if you could do it today with the new security measures used today. Had a so called friend that was basically only out for himself and burned many of us in various ways. He left his wallet laying out one day and I "barrowed" it and made a few quick calls. Sure was funny watching him pull up to the marina gas dock and fill the cruiser up then find out that none of his credit cards were valid anymore.
Use to have a couple of books titled Get Even and Get Even Two by George Hayduke that were the complete books of dirty tricks, but i always thought the best way was to get even in a manner that the target never knew he had been had.
By the way, that two part glue that comes in a syringe dispenser works great for locks.
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Been a long time ago, and I don't know if you could do it today with the new security measures used today. Had a so called friend that was basically only out for himself and burned many of us in various ways. He left his wallet laying out one day and I "barrowed" it and made a few quick calls. Sure was funny watching him pull up to the marina gas dock and fill the cruiser up then find out that none of his credit cards were valid anymore.
Use to have a couple of books titled Get Even and Get Even Two by George Hayduke that were the complete books of dirty tricks, but i always thought the best way was to get even in a manner that the target never knew he had been had.
By the way, that two part glue that comes in a syringe dispenser works great for locks.
I'll second that. I'm going to recount a tale along those lines, but for a lot of reasons, I need to hide the names involved.
I was working for a client - let's call it W. I was with Company A, hired to provide QA and QC services on a large IT development project - $20 million was the budget in fact. Company A had hired company X to do the work, and company X had hired company Y to be their junior partner. Still with me?
Toward the end of my involvement at Company W, I was about to start on a project at Company N, basically doing the same thing for Company N that I did at company W. My last week, I went to my Company W boss' desk early one morning to drop something off. across the aisle was company Y's site manager's (top guy) cube, and there were a few papers on the floor outside his cube that had obviously slipped off. Being the nice guy I am, I picked them up and started to put them on the guy's desk. At Company W, I saw notes about Company N - Companies X and Y were going after that project too.
I read the details and made a copy of the pages (no one was in the office yet), put them back precisely where I had found them on the floor, - it was a 4 page battle plan from Company Y alone on how they were going to take the $60 million project away from their partner (company X - who invited them in) AND get the Company N management team tossed out as well. All neatly signed by the President of Company Y.
After I was at company N for a few weeks, I took my liaison out to lunch (Company N's #2 on the project), and showed her the notes. She went white as rice, and then red with fury. Two weeks later the 2 site managers (including the one with Company W who had moved to Company N to work) were escorted under armed guard from the property. To this day they have no clue what happened or how.
;D
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She sounds like one of those types that kept the football when it landed in her yard when you were a kid. Bill T.
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Vengeance is a dish best served cold. Some one, a mobster I think, once said that to be truly effective acts of revenge need to go unpunished.
In other words, if you are going to do something rotten to pay some one back, leaving yourself open to consequences defeats the purpose. They need to know they got shafted, why they got shafted, and know that there is absolutely nothing they can do about it.
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They need to know they got shafted, why they got shafted, and know that there is absolutely nothing they can do about it.
That's why you always call them an a$$hole right before you pull the trigger! ;D Bill T.
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haha
classic TAB
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That's why you always call them an a$$hole right before you pull the trigger! ;D Bill T.
Wrong answer! You need to read the Evil Overlord' s list. Rule number 1: Shoot first, gloat later. Otherwise, it never ends well. ;D
FQ13
PS I know it's not rule one on the official list, its encapsulated in rules four, six and seven. But seriously, James Bond would have been a 45 minute movie if the bad guys had just shot him and not gloated or relied on shark tanks and buzz saws. Sometimes, less is more. ;D
Here's the list though, and worth a read. Its good for a chuckle if you like any sci-fi or adventure movies.
http://www.sff.net/paradise/overlord.html
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When my daughter lived on Capitol Hill here in DC parking was at a premium. There was an elderly lady that lived near her that claimed the on street parking place outside of her townhouse as private property. If you parked in "her" space she would at times come out and sprinkle your car with birdseed. This of course attracted the pigeons which.............
Fortunately my daughter had a private parking space.
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Thanx FQ, I'll be printing that out for use after the election. ;D