Author Topic: Friday Funnies  (Read 2086 times)

ronrdrcr

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Friday Funnies
« on: June 13, 2008, 12:28:26 PM »
This just came on the message board and I had to post it since there hasn't been a summary of mishaps with weapons for a while.

Enjoy

Ron


QQQQ
SUBJ: SUMMARY OF MISHAPS
UNCLASSIFIED//
ALSAFE 033/08
MSGID/GENADMIN/COMNAVSAFECEN/00/JUN//
SUBJ/SUMMARY OF MISHAPS//
GENTEXT/REMARKS/
1. WELCOME TO THE LATEST EDITION OF THE FRIDAY FUNNIES.
THINGS HAVE BEEN QUIET AROUND THE NOT-O.K. CORRAL LATELY.
TUMBLEWEEDS HAVE BEEN BLOWING DOWN MAIN STREET IN FRONT OF
THE SALOON. FIGURED WE WERE ABOUT HALFWAY TO BECOMING A
BONA FIDE GHOST TOWN.
A. THEN AN HM1 WAS OVER AT THE TOWN FIRING RANGE, CLEANING
HIS .45. HE FORGOT TO CLEAR THE CHAMBER OF A LIVE ROUND.
AND IF HE COULD ONLY HAVE FOLLOWED ANOTHER OF THE RULES OF
HANDGUN SAFETY, NAMELY TO NOT POINT AT ANYTHING YOU DON'T
INTEND TO SHOOT, HE WOULDN'T HAVE FIRED A ROUND THROUGH THE
PALM OF HIS LEFT HAND. THE MISHAP REPORT SAID IT WAS ONLY A
FIRST-AID INJURY AND THAT HE MISSED JUST ONE DAY OF WORK.
EITHER THIS GUY WAS ONE TOUGH HOMBRE, OR THEY HAVE A
DIFFERENT MEANING OF THE WORD "THROUGH."
B. THEN A STAFF SERGEANT STARTED CLEANING HIS .22 PISTOL.
HE DIDN'T MAKE SURE THAT IT WAS ON SAFE, AND HE DIDN'T MAKE
SURE IT WASN'T LOADED. SO HE EVENTUALLY SHOT HIMSELF IN HIS
HAND. HE WAS "EXPERIENCED WITH WEAPON SAFETY HANDLING AND
CLEANING," THE REPORT SAID. ALSO HIS CURRENT POST WAS AT AN
INFANTRY SCHOOL, WHERE IDEALLY YOU WANT TO BE A GOOD
EXAMPLE, NOT A BAD EXAMPLE. HE NEEDED SURGERY, MISSED A
WEEK OF WORK AND SPENT ANOTHER WEEK ON LIGHT DUTY.
C. WE FIGURED THINGS WERE SETTLING DOWN A BIT. THEY'D
CAPTURED THE HORSE THAT HAD BEEN TIED UP IN FRONT OF THE
SALOON AND THAT KICKED OVER THE WATER TROUGH. THE
TOWNSPEOPLE WERE BACK SHOPPING AT THE GENERAL STORE. THEN
AN MM3 DECIDED TO CLEAN HIS SHOOTING IRON. HE'D HAD SOME
FAMILIARIZATION TRAINING IN BOOT CAMP, BUT NOT ENOUGH TO
REMIND HIM TO MAKE SURE THE CHAMBER WAS CLEAR AFTER HE
REMOVED THE MAGAZINE FROM HIS 9MM PISTOL.
   "HE PRESSED THE FIREARM'S SLIDE BUTTON ON THE GRIP AND
PULLED THE TRIGGER TO RELEASE THE SLIDE AS INSTRUCTED IN
THE WEAPONS SAFETY MANUAL," THE REPORT SAID. NEXT, HE
PULLED THE TRIGGER AND FIRED A ROUND INTO HIS LEG, NOT AS
INSTRUCTED IN THE MANUAL. TORE A GOOD-SIZED HOLE AND BROKE
HIS FEMUR. FOLKS CARTED HIM OFF TO THE HOSPITAL FOR WHERE
HE SPENT THREE DAYS, AFTER WHICH HE WAS OFF WORK FOR FIVE
WEEKS AND ON LIMPDU FOR TWO WEEKS.
2. I'M THINKING THAT RELYING ON SOME BOOT-CAMP TRAINING
MIGHT BE A WAY TO END UP IN BOOT HILL. THERE'S A HUGE
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THINKING YOU KNOW HOW TO CLEAN A GUN AND
ACTUALLY KNOWING HOW TO DO IT. BEST MAKE SURE. AIMING IT AT
YOURSELF AND PULLING THE TRIGGER PROVES YOU DIDN'T KNOW HOW.
SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.//
#6198
BT
NNNN

Hazcat

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #1 on: June 13, 2008, 12:58:37 PM »
Do you have a link to this?
All tipoes and misspelings are copi-righted.  Pleeze do not reuse without ritten persimmons  :D

jaybet

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #2 on: June 13, 2008, 01:50:41 PM »
With all the worries people have about safeties or no safeties , etc. etc., I'm surprised so many folks will own a gun that you have to pull the trigger to break it down. It's just one more thing to go wrong.
I got the blues as my companion.

www.bluebone.net

ronrdrcr

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #3 on: June 13, 2008, 04:36:21 PM »
Do you have a link to this?

No link, it's a msg sent to military only.

Ron

Hazcat

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #4 on: June 14, 2008, 09:40:13 AM »
No link, it's a msg sent to military only.

Ron

Darn.  It's pretty dang funny!
All tipoes and misspelings are copi-righted.  Pleeze do not reuse without ritten persimmons  :D

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #5 on: Today at 01:20:59 PM »

twyacht

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #5 on: June 14, 2008, 11:38:33 AM »
THE REPORT SAID. NEXT, HE
PULLED THE TRIGGER AND FIRED A ROUND INTO HIS LEG, NOT AS
INSTRUCTED IN THE MANUAL

This is really, really, really sad...... Hysterical but really, really, sad,.... ::)
Thomas Jefferson: The strongest reason for the people to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against the tyranny of government. That is why our masters in Washington are so anxious to disarm us. They are not afraid of criminals. They are afraid of a populace which cannot be subdued by tyrants."
Col. Jeff Cooper.

CurrieS103

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Re: Friday Funnies
« Reply #6 on: June 14, 2008, 12:15:59 PM »
Every time I re-qual'd with the M-16 there was some idiot who thought he knew gun/range safety and eventually was reprimanded or kicked off the line by the Combat Arms guys.  There was a reason all the rangers carried a side arm on the range!
Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself. They are the American people's liberty teeth and keystone under independence. The very atmosphere of firearms everywhere restrains evil interference. - George Washington

 

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