Really Stupid Criminal Tricks

[Big Frank]

I want an I'm with stupid T-shirt where the hand points straight down.

[Fatman]

I want an I'm with stupid T-shirt where the hand points straight down.

 

[Big Frank]

I don't know if this is true or not. It was emailed to me.
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BURGLARY IN  FLORIDA
You just can't make this stuff up
     
When southern  Florida resident Nathan Radlich's house
was burglarized recently, thieves ignored his wide screen
plasma TV, his VCR, and even left his Rolex watch.

What they did take however, was a generic white
cardboard box filled with a grayish-white powder.
(That's the way the police report described it.)

A spokesman for the  Fort Lauderdale police said that it
looked similar to high grade cocaine and they'd probably
thought they'd hit the big time. 

Later, Nathan stood in front of numerous TV cameras and
pleaded with the burglars: "Please return the cremated
remains of my sister, Gertrude, she died three years
ago."

The next morning, the bullet-riddled corpse of a local
drug dealer known as Hoochie Pevens was found on
Nathan's doorstep. 

The cardboard box was there too; with about half of
Gertrude's ashes still remaining inside it.
     
Scotch taped to the box was this note which said:

"Hoochie sold us the bogus blow, so we wasted
Hoochie. Sorry we snorted your sister. No hard feelings. Have
a nice day".

And you thought  California was the land of fruits and
nuts!

[brosometal]

I don't know if this is true or not. It was emailed to me.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BURGLARY IN  FLORIDA
You just can't make this stuff up
     
When southern  Florida resident Nathan Radlich's house
was burglarized recently, thieves ignored his wide screen
plasma TV, his VCR, and even left his Rolex watch.

What they did take however, was ...

... taped to the box was this note which said:

"Hoochie sold us the bogus blow, so we wasted
Hoochie. Sorry we snorted your sister. No hard feelings. Have
a nice day".

And you thought  California was the land of fruits and
nuts!

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/cannibal/cocaine.asp

[Big Frank]

It figures. Why is it that every time an email says, "You just can't make this stuff up", it turns out someone just made this stuff up?

[Sponsor]

[tt11758]

I remember about 30 years ago in my hometown some rocket scientist tried to hold up an all-night grocery store with an unloaded revolver.  The checker into whose face he stuck the gun was one of us, and seeing that the gun wasn't loaded, proceeded to batter him about the head and shoulders with that little stick that you use to seperate your order from the person ahead of you on the conveyor thingie.

[Fatman]

Bang for his buck: Man sunk by gun in bag of coins
Fri Feb 20, 5:47 pm ET

CAMDEN, Ark. – If only he had remembered to take the pistol out of a sack of nickels he brought to a bank, he may have remained free and not become a suspect in a recent burglary. An 18-year-old man entered the BancorpSouth branch Wednesday to change $88 worth of nickels to paper money, Camden police said. After spotting the gun, the teller told a supervisor, who called police.

After police questioned him, they had cause to obtain a search warrant for his home, where they found $16,000 worth of allegedly stolen property, including eight firearms. Camden police Capt. Scott Rosson said many of the nickels were from a stolen coin collection.

The Ouachita County Jail said Friday that the man was charged with resisting arrest and possession of a firearm. Police were investigating the burglary aspect of the case. The jail didn't have information on his bond.

Rosson said the man had no intention of robbing the bank. The .44-caliber handgun was not loaded but ammunition for the gun was also in the bag. Police said the man planned to sell the gun at a pawn shop.

[Fatman]

Man in jail for impersonating cops charged again
1 hr 11 mins ago

MADISON, Wis. – A man already serving time for impersonating an officer apparently hasn't learned his lesson. Joshua D. Kay, 30, was charged with a new count of impersonating an officer. At an initial court appearance Friday he stood mute so the court entered a plea of not guilty.

Prosecutors said Kay has been telling other inmates he's actually a sheriff's deputy, working undercover to investigate other deputies. Online court records didn't list an attorney for Kay on Saturday.

Kay is serving an eight-month jail sentence for three misdemeanors. Among them was a 2007 conviction for turning on flashing red lights and a siren on his personal car to try to stop a speeder. The other car was being driven by an off-duty police officer.

___

Information from: Wisconsin State Journal, http://www.madison.com/wsj

Claims to be LEO to inmate while in jail. Death wish?   

[Big Frank]

Claims to be LEO to inmate while in jail. Death wish?   

Really Stupid Criminal

[Fatman]

 "What a marroon!" - Bugs Bunny

'Dumbest criminal' nabbed in cop convention holdup
1 hr 52 mins ago

HARRISBURG, Pa. – A retired police chief said he was robbed by "probably the dumbest criminal in Pennsylvania," at a police officers' convention on Friday morning. John Comparetto said as he came out of a stall in the men's room, a man pointed a gun in his face and demanded money. There were 300 narcotics officers from Pennsylvania and Ohio at the gathering.

Comparetto gave up his money and cell phone. But when the man fled, Comparetto and some colleagues chased him. They arrested a 19-year-old man as he was trying to leave in a taxi.

The suspect is also awaiting trial on four previous robbery charges.

The suspect was arraigned and taken to Dauphin County Prison. When a reporter asked the suspect for comment as he was led out of court, he said, "I'm smooth."

    smooth
Pronunciation:    \ˈsmüth\ Function:    adjective Etymology:    Middle English smothe, from Old English smōth; akin to Old Saxon smōthi smooth
Date:    before 12th century

1 a (1): having a continuous even surface (2)of a curve : being the representation of a function with a continuous first derivative (3): having or being a short even coat of hair <a smooth collie> — compare rough , wirehaired b: being without hair c: glabrous <a smooth leaf> d: causing no resistance to sliding2: free from difficulties or impediments <the smooth course of his life>3: even and uninterrupted in flow or flight4: excessively and often artfully suave : ingratiating <a smooth operator>5 a: serene , equable <a smooth disposition> b: amiable , courteous 6 a: not sharp or harsh <a smooth sherry> b: free from lumps

I vote for 6b, unless they took him to the back room.