Worldwide I think you’ll find the 9mm/.380 family one of the most popular handgun loads. Here in the US until a decade or so ago the .38spl/.357mag family was probably the most popular for defense. Of course they surpassed the .32 S&W family which was popular in the early 1900’s.
While the 9mm & .38 are very similar in diameter, the .38 is slightly larger at .357 diameter and the 9mm family are .355 in diameter. I remember reading in the gun magazines in the late 80’s and early 90’s when the big debate was raging about replacing the .45 with the 9mm in the US military that some scribes were spouting that the European’s must be weaker because they used the 9 and w used the 45 . . . man the adoption of the 9 sure caused a lot of discussion! Of course that was before the development of the great bullet designs we have now. While I have a couple of 9mm pistols and one AR in that caliber as well as several .380’s it’s not my number one caliber to carry. If I need a smaller handgun I’ll carry a S&W 640 or a Colt Detective Special. When I can carry a bigger caliber it’s a 40 or 45 in auto and a .357 in a big revolver.
Back to the .380 / 9mm question, when I was with the ME’s office in the 90’s I worked many gun shoot cases and have based many of my carry ideas based on what I witnessed. I once worked a case of a Deputy Sheriff killed in the line of duty (one of my worst days on the job). The deputy was hit three times with a .380 FMJ and two 12 ga shotgun slugs. We really didn’t believe the .380 wounds would have been fatal. Of course these days we have superior bullet designs that are made to work with specific calibers and speeds. In the case of .380 vs 9mm while they are the same diameter they operate at totally different speeds. Yesteryear they might have used FMJ bullets, but today most .380 HP’s are designed for that specific speed as opposed to the 9x19 projectile which is designed to perform at a greater speed.
I’m sure you can find reliable antidotal from fellow Downrangers to help you decide on caliber and bullet design.