I Feel Old On A Saturday Night.

[twyacht]

As some remember, my son has been down here for the last two weeks. He's 14, as tall as me, 6'2", and not stopping. Went to the grocery store almost every damn day. He ate whenever you asked him if he was hungry, and still slim, fit and trim, as I once was long ago.

He went back to N.C. yesterday, and I won't see him again til Spring. His voice is changing between "manly/boyish" and cracks; and the times when he was just a happy "little" boy seem gone.

I put him to work cleaning the "inventory" in the safe, he remembers everything, every nuance of the Walther PPK/S, how the Mauser bolt is removed for cleaning, hell, he can break down my Sig556 as fast as I can, remove the bolt assembly, wipe it down, and reassemble it with safety check in less than a minute, the 45Colt, etc,...

His response is "I know Dad, I know, I remember,",.....All of them are going to him anyway,...

 Kids grow up so fast, in such a world, in such a time, and it made me feel old;..... not in an "age" way, but more of a parental way to see him field strip my Glock21, and reassemble it, and ask if I was going to have any trigger jobs done to my pistols?

Regardless, thanks again for the Down Range Cafe to just "vent" a little. Caught this song from Cat Stevens, before he became whoever he is now. When he was just a great guitar player and singer.

[DDMac]

Me too. It is difficult when there are no more of those subtle, routine daily contacts that, years later, manifest themselves in positive character traits. The growing up is so much more noticed when it happens in absentia. I suppose the best that can be agreed upon is good, regular communications via any means possible. Sounds like you did a lot of the right thing for him already.

I have become aware, Tom, that there has been a role reversal in talking with my grown son. Now I am the one asking the questions and he is providing the answers. That is probably as it should be.
Yep, feeling old on a Saturday night.
Mac.

Oh, crap. I AM old!! Need a trip to Florida to improve the outlook. Maybe Mouse Town with the grandson...
Mc.

[fightingquaker13]

I kind of feel the same way in reverse. Every time I visit the old man, he just seems a little older. Not so you'd notice, and he still paddles his canoe out into the Glades and such, but I see it. It really does sober you up, because you know it won't be too long before he can't, and I will always see him as this "can do" sort of guy, just like your kid will always be ten in your eyes. Time is a mean and viscious bitch.
FQ13

[deepwater]

damnit TW... you ain't old... though the youngster may make you feel that way, remember, it's all relative. how old do feel? (I mean apart from the kid makin' you feel old) I don't feel my years (except when they hurt) so relax, have a nice cold beer and know you're doing a good job with the little fella.

deepwater.

[TAB]

We had great plans for tonight... then my wife got called in...   

I swear one of these days a BFH is going to be used on that damn cell phone.

[Sponsor]

[fightingquaker13]

We had great plans for tonight... then my wife got called in...   

I swear one of these days a BFH is going to be used on that damn cell phone.

Welcome to dating a doc. I once told my, at the time naked, GF that if she actually went into the hospital it would be for nothing as I was going to shoot the son of a bitch anyway for interrupting. It didn't work.
FQ13

[m25operator]

TW please don't feel old, my dad about 15 yrs ago, scared the s**t out of me, and he was only 65 then, he lived 4 hrs away at the time, he said son, why don't you come up here and just get all these guns and take them home with you, I said dad, if I do, that means we will never hunt together again, and my answer is NO. That allowed us a few more years together in the field. He has not repeated the offer and I hope he will leave them to his grandsons. Dad was simple and I can tell you what is in his arsenal.

1)  Browning A5 30" full choke barrel, Dad liked duck and goose when he was young, bought in 1958  when I was born.

2)  Remington nylon 66, tube fed, not a black diamond.

3) S&W 649 38 special, I got for him, when I had an ffl.

4) Springfield 1903 A3 sporterized by I don't know who, with a Gibson 3x9 scope, it is beautiful, and dad never misses with it, shot my 1st deer with it.

Thats it, but all bases covered, from small game, fun, big game, fowl and CCW.

TW again you amaze me with your musical knowledge, I was a Cat Stevens fan, but he was out of the musical picture I bet when you were 10. Have no doubt today, he would not want it but has said jihad is just.

[fightingquaker13]

TW please don't feel old, my dad about 15 yrs ago, scared the s**t out of me, and he was only 65 then, he lived 4 hrs away at the time, he said son, why don't you come up here and just get all these guns and take them home with you, I said dad, if I do, that means we will never hunt together again, and my answer is NO. That allowed us a few more years together in the field. He has not repeated the offer and I hope he will leave them to his grandsons. Dad was simple and I can tell you what is in his arsenal.

1)  Browning A5 30" full choke barrel, Dad liked duck and goose when he was young, bought in 1958  when I was born.

2)  Remington nylon 66, tube fed, not a black diamond.

3) S&W 649 38 special, I got for him, when I had an ffl.

4) Springfield 1903 A3 sporterized by I don't know who, with a Gibson 3x9 scope, it is beautiful, and dad never misses with it, shot my 1st deer with it.

Thats it, but all bases covered, from small game, fun, big game, fowl and CCW.

TW again you amaze me with your musical knowledge, I was a Cat Stevens fan, but he was out of the musical picture I bet when you were 10. Have no doubt today, he would not want it but has said jihad is just.

Nice post operator. You pretty much summed up what I feel about my old man. The thing about Cat Stevens also struck a chord. He always seemed like a sincere peacenik, not just striking a pose because it was popular. Now.....well,  organized religion is a dangerous thing. Faith is good, but when you start letting faith lead you to belive what other fallible men are telling you, you are flirting with disaster.
FQ13

[jaybet]

Thanks for the thread, TW. I've got both ends of the conversation. My dad has been gone for about 10 years now. He wasn't the best guy in the world... didn't teach me about guns or much else, and only had a few values he preached to me over and over. He didn't live by some of those values either, and ended up being an enigma- very disappointing in some ways but he was my dad and we had our moments. Dad DID force me to learn to play the organ, and that's how I got started playing dinner music in restaurants at age 12, so he did give me the key to my musical talent and that addiction(even if it was against my will at the time).

Getting to know him as an adult and watching him age and eventually deteriorate was really "the big lesson". I watched "Life" happen to him, and it helped me understand what I needed to do. One day when we were getting along fairly well and he was about 87, we were having lunch together and talking about life. In talking about my past I said something about wishing I had known then what I know now. He wasn't the smartest guy in the world but dad says to me, "Ah...don't worry about it. Right now at 87 I'd make a hell of a 65 year old".
As years went on, I did what I could for him when no one else would give him the time of day, and he was gone at 93. In some ways I think it was a good education about him, life, and about myself.

That brings me to now. My son (our youngest of 2 girls and him) is almost 22, almost out of college, and is becoming manly. He worried us a lot- he's the moody type and would never talk about trouble 'till it was 10 feet tall and busting down the front door. But like TW says and some of you others...he has started to see me as getting older. His mother and I are not the smartest, strongest people in the world anymore. He sees our faults, he sees us question things, sees us make mistakes. He tries to advise us in his young way. He shows us more affection than before, and since he's finally found a woman that he's serious about and his sisters are having kids, he has kicked up the "serious" a notch and I don't worry so much anymore.

Tw is right...there's a feeling that comes with this. I don't think it's sadness. The word that comes to mind is "melancholy". it's not sad, it's just a wistful fondness for the way things no longer ARE- the invitability of change.

But I like this. I know I'm losing my edge. I can still take him if I'm quick, but I know some day soon my boy will be the warrior in the family. But at the same time I have no choice....I'm ripe fruit and that's reality. It's really great to get to know him as a man and to enjoy his company. It's great to have his appreciation too. He comes to some of my gigs and let's me know that but for a twist of fate I could have been incredibly rich and famous. In his concern for me as an aging guy I can see what he will be like when he's got a son of his own and I'm enjoying it.

I was talking to a friend who's son has a family. He said, "It's the BEST when your kids are grown. I go visit, sit out in the yard with a beer and have a cigar with my kid and tease his little rug rats....it's the best."

Sometimes, like my dad, I have trouble practicing what I preach, but when you're 70 you're not 50. You can embrace that "your as young as you feel" crap all you want, but you don't want to MISS the aging years because you're trying too hard to live in the past. Enjoy your age and wisdom and your position as patriarch. It is your right in life, just as it was for you to be that strong, hard working stud.
Thanks for bringing this up... it's a good thing to explore.

[TexGun]

TW,

I guess I'm lucky in that my boys are with me 50% of the time.  The ex and I were able to agree that it is in the boys best interest for them to have as much access to the both of us as possible. (and that's about all we agree on) 

That being said, I know exactly what you mean.  My oldest is only 12, but he and the 8 year old amaze me every day with what they know compared to what I knew at their age.  This year I was able to take more time off than normal during the holidays and spent almost every day with them.  We went to the range twice and i was amazed at how the older one could handle the Mark II on the 10 inch steel plates.  Right now "Dad" is the center of thier lives, and my mission is to live my life in such a way as to not let them down.

There is harldy a day that goes by that one of them doesn't do something that makes me laugh out loud.  I am sure that with the teen years just around the corner "dad" will be put on the back burner for a little while.

TexGun