Joe Biden ~~The Gaffe Machine

[Teresa Heilevang]

"I wouldn't go anywhere in confined places now. … When one person sneezes it goes all the way through the aircraft. That's me. I would not be, at this point, if they had another way of transportation, suggesting they ride the subway." --Joe Biden, providing handy tips to protect against the swine flu and freaking us out, "Today Show" interview, April 30, 2009
Source: http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/o.htm?zi=1/XJ&zTi=1&sdn=politicalhumor&cdn=entertainment&tm=355&gps=289_317_738_402&f=21&su=p504.3.336.ip_&tt=2&bt=0&bts=0&zu=http%3A//www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-biden1-2009may01%2C0%2C604907.story


"An hour late, oh give me a f**king break." –Joe Biden, caught on a live mic speaking to a former Senate colleague after arriving on Amtrak at Union Station in Washington, D.C., March 13, 2009
Watch video clip:


"You know, I'm embarrassed. Do you know the Web site number? I should have it in front of me and I don't. I'm actually embarrassed." –Joe Biden, speaking to an aide standing out of view during an interview on CBS' "Early Show," in the midst of encouraging viewers to visit a government-run Web site that tracks stimulus spending, Feb. 25, 2009

"If we do everything right, if we do it with absolute certainty, there's still a 30% chance we're going to get it wrong." --Joe Biden, speaking to members of the House Democratic caucus who were gathered in Williamsburg, Va., for their annual retreat, Feb. 6, 2009

"Am I doing this again? For the senior staff? My memory is not as good as Chief Justice Roberts'." --Joe Biden, mocking Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts' botched effort to swear in Barack Obama as Biden was set to swear in White House senior staff one day after the Inauguration snafu, Washington, D.C., Jan. 21, 2009

"Jill and I had the great honor of standing on that stage, looking across at one of the great justices, Justice Stewart." –Joe Biden, mistakenly referring to Justice John Paul Stevens, who swore him in as vice president, Washington, D.C., Jan. 20, 2009
Watch video clip:



"Look, John's last-minute economic plan does nothing to tackle the number-one job facing the middle class, and it happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: jobs. J-O-B-S, jobs." --Joe Biden, Athens, Ohio, Oct. 15, 2008
Source: http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/o.htm?zi=1/XJ&zTi=1&sdn=politicalhumor&cdn=entertainment&tm=7&gps=28_1199_738_402&f=21&su=p504.3.336.ip_&tt=2&bt=0&bts=0&zu=http%3A//blogs.abcnews.com/politicalpunch/2008/10/oh-that-joe-n-6.html

 
"When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television and didn't just talk about the, you know, the princes of greed. He said, 'Look, here's what happened." –Joe Biden, apparently unaware that FDR wasn't president when the stock market crashed in 1929 and that only experimental TV sets were in use at that time, interview with Katie Couric, Sept. 22, 2008
Watch video clip:


"Hillary Clinton is as qualified or more qualified than I am to be vice president of the United States of America. Quite frankly, it might have been a better pick than me." --Joe Biden, speaking at a town hall meeting in Nashua, New Hampshire, Sept. 10, 2008
Source: http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/09/10/biden-musings-on-hillary-clinton/


"A man I'm proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next President of the United States — Barack America!" --Joe Biden, at his first campaign rally with Barack Obama after being announced as his running mate, Springfield, Ill., Aug. 23, 2008
Watch video clip:


"A successful dump!" --Joe Biden, explaining his whereabouts (dropping deadwood at the dump) to the reporters outside his home, Wilmington, Del., Aug. 20, 2008


"I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that's a storybook, man." –Joe Biden, referring to Barack Obama at the beginning of the 2008 Democratic primary campaign, Jan. 31, 2007 Source: http://politicalhumor.about.com/gi/o.htm?zi=1/XJ&zTi=1&sdn=politicalhumor&cdn=entertainment&tm=29&gps=233_1809_738_402&f=21&su=p504.3.336.ip_&tt=2&bt=0&bts=0&zu=http%3A//abcnews.go.com/Politics/Story%3Fid%3D2838420


"You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent.... I'm not joking." --Joe Biden, in a private remark to an Indian-American man caught on C-SPAN, June, 2006 Watch video clip:

 And my Favorite:


"Stand up, Chuck, let 'em see ya." –-Joe Biden, to Missouri state Sen. Chuck Graham, who is in a wheelchair, Columbia, Missouri, Sept. 12, 2008
Watch video clip:

[fightingquaker13]

The dems have Joe Biden, the GOP has Michael Steele. I think BO wishes he had chosen Hillary for the job. This guy would be spending his time in Waziristan if he were my veep. "Someone want to shoot him? Anyone? Please, help a brother out. C'mon guys, please, I'll pay for the bullet".
FQ13

[tombogan03884]

Joe makes me laugh, but they keep the poor dumb shmuck locked in the basement of the Naval Observatory.  

[tt11758]

Joe makes me laugh, but they keep the poor dumb shmuck locked in the basement of the Naval Observatory.  

He makes me laugh, too................until I stop and realize that the ignorant SOB is one heartbeat away from the Oval Office!!

On the other hand, they might be saying the same thing about me in 2013!! 

[ericire12]

The gift that keeps on giving!

[Sponsor]

[tombogan03884]

He makes me laugh, too................until I stop and realize that the ignorant SOB is one heartbeat away from the Oval Office!!

On the other hand, they might be saying the same thing about me in 2013!! 

You realize that we need to arrange a REALLY scary  Speaker of the house as life insurance, like BO did 

[Solus]

You realize that we need to arrange a REALLY scary  Speaker of the house as life insurance, like BO did 

It's never to early to start thinking of appointments either.

Does Chuck Norris work for Attorney General?

[Pathfinder]

You realize that we need to arrange a REALLY scary  Speaker of the house as life insurance, like BO did 

Me!     

[jnevis]

I think BO wishes he had chosen Hillary for the job.

For as grating as she is Hillary isn't stupid.  She knew that if she accepted the VP appointment she'd be DONE.  In 2012 she'd have to stay as VP instead of a Presidential canidate.  Obummer will probably be voted out in 12, Slick Willy being the only Dem that has been elected for a second term since FDR.  Once he's gone, in 2016 she can run for Pres and say "Look BHO was a failure and I'm better than the current President," whoever that might be.  If she'd been VP in 2016, if they made it that far, everyone would be so in the dumps that even Mass would vote Republican, oh wait that's already happening!

[crusader rabbit]

He makes me laugh, too................until I stop and realize that the ignorant SOB is one heartbeat away from the Oval Office!!

And then I start to cry...  until I realize that if Joe takes a dirt nap, Nancy's in charge...  And then I get out the Scotch.