FQ,
The reason they won't deal with you is that they know you will call BS on them. I'm not saying it is the doctor per se, but most doctors are a part of some organization that is "sell, sell sell." I watched it happen with the clinic I used to go to when the owner sold to a large group to start his retirement. Suddenly my checkbook was no good. We were farming and had no insurance, so I switched to another clinic that was private ... no problem.
As long as you have insurance they can charge for anything and everything, and you won't say a word cause it all goes to the insurance company. If you pay, you demand itemization, and you question. All this means their profits get hit.