New Direction for the war on terrorists.

[Teresa Heilevang]

I got this from a friend of mine and thought it might lighten the mood up in here a bit.
Although it really DOES have a whole lot of common sense ring to it.
M'Ette

Want to know how to win the war on terrorists?    Draft Guys over 60
 "Send Prior Service Vets over 60 "

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. (You can't be older than 42 to join the military.)   
They've got the whole thing backwards.  Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys.  You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters:


Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. "My back hurts!  I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry!" We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.
 
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m.
Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, "I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.
 
If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
 
 Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we like soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
 
 They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.  I can hear the Drill Sgt now, "Get down and give me ... er ... one."
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too.  I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
 
 An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him.  He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl.  He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.  These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
 
 Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten cowards who attacked us on September 11. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.
 If nothing else, put us on the border and I guarantee we'll have it secured the first night.

[DonWorsham]

Well.... Let me just say I'm glad  I'm not 60 yet.   

[2HOW]

Ill do the border gig anytime. Not the sandbox.

[DonWorsham]

Ill do the border gig anytime.

Only if armed and allowed to defend myself.

[jaybet]

I wouldn't go to Iraq, but I could be persuaded to go on an Osama hunt.

[Sponsor]

[joemerchant24]

Well, what I mean by that, sir, is... if you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and includin' one mile of Adolf Hitler (er... Osama bin Laden, I mean) with a clear line of sight, sir... pack your bags, fellas, war's over. Amen.

[ellis4538]

I'm 61 and that does have a nice ring to it...free travel, free food, free clothes and especially getting paid to shoot all the ammo I want.  I'd sign up if I could remember where I put my reading glasses and cane.

[DonWorsham]

I'm 61 and that does have a nice ring to it...free travel, free food, free clothes and especially getting paid to shoot all the ammo I want.  I'd sign up if I could remember where I put my reading glasses and cane.

Please stand in front of me when you shoot!   

[ellis4538]

Actually I'm a pretty big target too!

Thanks for your vote of confidence!!!!!!!

[MikeBjerum]

I'm not 60 yet, but if that no neck drill Sgt. can figure out where to cut the bifocal on my glasses so I can see through the scope I'll be on the next flight.  How about 3:30 AM, I get up to pee then anyway,  and if you don't let me go I just get more pissed, so to speak, anyway.