For as much as it has pleased Almighty IBM to take out of this world the soul of fightingquaker13's Toshiba , we therefore commit his Laptop to the slums of india to be picked over by urchins, earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, looking for that blessed hope when Bill gates Himself shall descend from Microsoft Heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of Steve Jobs, and the Laptop from shanty towns shall rise first. Then those which are still running and remain shall be upgraded together with them in the factories of China to meet the Magnificant Bill in the parking lot of Walmart, and so shall we ever be with the Bill and Steves, wherefore comfort ye one another with these words.
Amen.