Here we go again

[1911 Junkie]

Thanks everyone for the support and prayers last time around.

Things are starting up again. Tomorrow is the first (of probably a few) hearings about custody of the kids and other matters.  In writing I share 50/50 custody but I have usually had the kids more. I think it's time for me to have primary custody.

I'm getting tired of having to answer a lot of tough questions the kids have. "Why does mama make us sleep on the floor all the time? It's not comfortable. Why doesn't mama play with us that much?"

I have to explain to the kids that it isn't their fault that they miss school. I asked my daughter why she didn't go to school and she says "mama said I slept too long and can't go". My son has missed 18 days so far this year. He has been sick a lot this year from the stress he is under but nowhere near 18 days worth. Still waiting on my daughters attendance records but the teacher said she has been missing a lot, and she hasn't really been sick. I know I'm getting them to school.......  

They are 4 and 5 years old. They shouldn't have to put up with this.

I'm not a fan of having a judge decide these matters but I don't feel I have a choice.

Please pray for the kids and for the judge to see through her BS and make a good decision.

Thanks,
Brett

[tt11758]

Thanks everyone for the support and prayers last time around.

Things are starting up again. Tomorrow is the first (of probably a few) hearings about custody of the kids and other matters.  In writing I share 50/50 custody but I have usually had the kids more. I think it's time for me to have primary custody.

I'm getting tired of having to answer a lot of tough questions the kids have. "Why does mama make us sleep on the floor all the time? It's not comfortable. Why doesn't mama play with us that much?"

I have to explain to the kids that it isn't their fault that they miss school. I asked my daughter why she didn't go to school and she says "mama said I slept too long and can't go". My son has missed 18 days so far this year. He has been sick a lot this year from the stress he is under but nowhere near 18 days worth. Still waiting on my daughters attendance records but the teacher said she has been missing a lot, and she hasn't really been sick. I know I'm getting them to school.......  

They are 4 and 5 years old. They shouldn't have to put up with this.

I'm not a fan of having a judge decide these matters but I don't feel I have a choice.

Please pray for the kids and for the judge to see through her BS and make a good decision.

Thanks,
Brett

Prayers have been sent, and are continuing, my friend.  You're a good man, hang in there.  This is one time I'm happy to do it "for the children".

TT

[Solus]

Junkie,

You have a couple of considerations here.

If, as you state, your wife is not providing a good environment for the kids and you don't think it has much chance of improving, you are right in considering gaining primary custodianship.

However, legal action without trying to work with your wife might not be best.  Her lawyer will work to convince her to fight it as he will get paid more for the fight.

Your wife might be willing to give up custody.  She might be aware that she is not providing the best for her children, but is not willing to openly admit she is "a bad mother".  Perhaps asking for primary custody until she is able to get things in order might go over better, but that will be out of court and away from lawyers.  Try to find some way for her to gain some "high ground" here.

She also might be concerned that should you get primary custody, she could be responsible for child support.  

Letting her know she won't be asked for child support and finding a way where she can give up custody without admitting she is bad for her children might get you to where you want to be.

Good luck and strength in all this, you are going to need all you can get.

Remember your goal is to provide the best for your children, not so show your wife where she has been wrong.

Take care.

[saltydogbk]

I'll be there in 3 weeks, so, yes I will pray for your kids and you.

[shooter32]

Prayers for you and yours kids, keep being the father they need and good things will happen!

Take care my friend.

[Sponsor]

[shooter32]

I'll be there in 3 weeks, so, yes I will pray for your kids and you.

Your on my list salty!! 

[1911 Junkie]

I've exhausted all other means.

I have tried to talk to her but that ends up with her going into a screaming rage. She's openly hostile and in no way willing to communicate.

This isn't where I wanted to take this and the absolute last thing I want to put the kids through.  Maybe if a third party gets involved she might try to do better.  The only thing I can do is continue to be there for the kids and try to improve their situation.

Salty, you have my prayers. It isn't a fun thing to go through.

[Hazcat]

Prayers have been sent, and are continuing, my friend.  You're a good man, hang in there.  This is one time I'm happy to do it "for the children".

TT

Wot he^ said in SPADES!!

[ellis4538]

1911, you have never left my list and SD you will be added.

God Bless,

Richard

[MikeBjerum]

Still here for you.  Keep us informed as needed.