Author Topic: Some adult truths  (Read 2323 times)

Pecos Bill

  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 461
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
Some adult truths
« on: January 10, 2012, 12:06:13 PM »
1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not
know what time it is.
 
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
 
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
 
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
 
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
 
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
 
7. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on their # 5. I'm pretty
sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
 
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
 
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind-of tired.
 
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
 
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
 
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't
want to have to restart my collection . . . again.
 
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if
I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
 
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.
 
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
 
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with an adult beverage than Kay.
 
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
 
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
 
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and
smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
 
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to
prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and
sisters!
 
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.
 
22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys
in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey -
but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away,
in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
 
23. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and
the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

Pecos
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress, but I repeat myself." - Mark Twain

BAC

  • Guest
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2012, 12:28:05 PM »
So many truths there.

Hazcat

  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10457
  • DRTV Ranger
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
All tipoes and misspelings are copi-righted.  Pleeze do not reuse without ritten persimmons  :D

Timothy

  • Guest
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2012, 02:30:54 PM »
Item 21...Levi Straus says you should NEVER wash a pair of jeans.  Just fold them up after wearing and put them in the freezer overnight.  That kills all of the bacterial contaminants that cause them to stink.

YUCK!

Pecos Bill

  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 461
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #4 on: January 10, 2012, 03:21:42 PM »
Haz, remember also: quando omni flunkus moritati.

Pecos
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress, but I repeat myself." - Mark Twain

Sponsor

  • Guest
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #5 on: Today at 05:13:11 PM »

fightingquaker13

  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11894
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #5 on: January 10, 2012, 03:39:41 PM »
ROFL. ;D
FQ13

1Buckshot

  • Monty Lucht
  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 452
  • COMMENCE FIRING
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2012, 04:38:16 PM »
Been there and done that on most. ::) I  just Email this to the wife at work to brighten up her afternoon. NO I AM NOT STUPID> I left off the last one. They don't need Any more ammunition on us. ;D

Hazcat

  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10457
  • DRTV Ranger
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2012, 06:52:25 PM »
Haz, remember also: quando omni flunkus moritati.

Pecos

The possum lodge!

I'm a man,
But I can change.......

If I have to.

;D
All tipoes and misspelings are copi-righted.  Pleeze do not reuse without ritten persimmons  :D

r_w

  • Top Forum Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 947
  • Liked:
  • Likes Given: 0
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2012, 07:50:22 PM »
The possum lodge!

I'm a man,
But I can change.......

If I have to.

;D

I guess...
"Why are you carrying a pistol?  Expecting trouble?"

"No Maam.  If I was expecting trouble, I'd have a rifle."

tombogan03884

  • Guest
Re: Some adult truths
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2012, 10:22:35 PM »
The possum lodge!

I'm a man,
But I can change.......
Deal with it.
If I have to.
After you get my dinner.
;D

FIFY      ;D

 

SMF spam blocked by CleanTalk