Author Topic: Non Gun Stuff...  (Read 388881 times)

Teresa Heilevang

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #60 on: August 19, 2008, 05:34:20 PM »



Choose your words veeeery carefully PegLeg........................explain..........................





 ;D
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PegLeg45

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #61 on: August 19, 2008, 06:53:15 PM »
Uh Oh.......
Are those eggshells I hear beneath my feet???????

Might be time to stuff a sock in it....or tie my hands behind my back so I can't type...... ;D

Heck, I wasn't alive in 1954 when it was written......my wife thought it was funny...a sick kinda funny........but funny... :D

Oh well, can't win 'em all.
At this rate, I can't win any.
 8)
"I expect perdition, I always have. I keep this building at my back, and several guns handy, in case perdition arrives in a form that's susceptible to bullets. I expect it will come in the disease form, though. I'm susceptible to diseases, and you can't shoot a damned disease." ~ Judge Roy Bean, Streets of Laredo

For the Patriots of this country, the Constitution is second only to the Bible for most. For those who love this country, but do not share my personal beliefs, it is their Bible. To them nothing comes before the Constitution of these United States of America. For this we are all labeled potential terrorists. ~ Dean Garrison

"When it comes to the enemy, just because they ain't pullin' a trigger, doesn't mean they ain't totin' ammo for those that are."~PegLeg

Teresa Heilevang

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #62 on: August 19, 2008, 06:57:38 PM »

Heck, I wasn't alive in 1954 when it was written......my wife thought it was funny...a sick kinda funny........but funny... :D

  Not alive in 54?  Well you'se  jus' a wee baby then.. You are forgiven...  ::)

 ;D ;D ;D

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question?....What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer.

But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first .

The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life.

He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur.

He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered....is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared.

And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened.

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day....or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

What Lancelot chose is below. BUT..................................


.make YOUR choice before you scroll down below.



OKAY?















Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now....what is the moral to this story?

The moral is.....
If you don't let a woman have her own way....
Things are going to get ugly!!!
"Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History ! "
 

ellis4538

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #63 on: August 20, 2008, 06:21:49 AM »
Yes Dear.....
Used to be "The only thing to FEAR was FEAR ITSELF", nowadays "The only thing to FEAR is GETTING CAUGHT!"

DDMac

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #64 on: August 20, 2008, 02:58:51 PM »
Without cheating, my answer was the same. I am well trained, but not broken. ;)
I think I started smoking in 1954.
Mac.
Standing up for your Right to lay down suppressive fire since 1948!

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #65 on: Today at 03:14:09 PM »

ericire12

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #65 on: August 20, 2008, 03:08:43 PM »
As it should be...........  ;)




Ill do you one better.... the best Bud Light commercial EVER:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJJL5dxgVaM
Everything I needed to learn in life I learned from Country Music.

Teresa Heilevang

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #66 on: August 20, 2008, 03:45:31 PM »


Loved it..  ;D
"Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History ! "
 

tumblebug

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #67 on: August 21, 2008, 05:01:08 PM »
 LMAOff now to work on this BELLY.

Walter45Auto

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #68 on: August 23, 2008, 10:46:19 PM »


Ill do you one better.... the best Bud Light commercial EVER:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJJL5dxgVaM

 That's got to be the funniest commercial I've ever seen!!!! I wonder if I could use one of those as a GUN FUND???? ;D
"If You seek to do me harm, I don't care about your past." - Michael Bane

Ocin

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Re: Non Gun Stuff...
« Reply #69 on: August 24, 2008, 06:15:03 AM »
Among the many misdeeds of the British rule in India, history will look upon the act of depriving a whole nation of arms, as the blackest.
Gandhi, An Autobiography, p. 446 (Beacon Press paperback edition)

 

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