You know you're an idiot when...

[Dakotaranger]

You know you're an idiot when you try to help someone and they say they will pay you back, they don't. And to make things worse you find a pistol that would be a great carry gun that you could afford IF you didn't try to help. And if... that wasn't bad enough they aren't any better off than when you tried to help.

I don't really care about the money.  I'm just ticked because I thought my friend was getting better, BUT she's starting to relapse and I DID ABSOLUTELY NO GOOD in my attempt to help.  I really am more concearned with her wellbeing it's just one of those I needed to gripe especially when the Kimber with the Crimson Trace grips are right at what I spent to help her.  And no she isn't a gold digger.

[fightingquaker13]

Dakota
I'm not sure what you're talking about, but I can make a pretty good guess. You're not an idiot, but a stand up guy. I think that at the end of the day being able to look yourself in the eye and say I tried is worth more than a pistol. Just my .02. And I wish her well.
FQ13

[Dakotaranger]

Last Summer I had a friend litterally go crazy.  I spent quite abit getting whatever she needed, driving her around, and was and just taking care of her.  I thought we got through it and she was ok, but she's starting to slip again.

I know it was worth it, I just can't believe this is starting again

[tombogan03884]

 I remember a long while back you posted about an incident with a lady friend who had issues of some sort.
 You can not "help" any one until THEY are determined to BE helped .While you are lusting after the pistol ask yourself if you would be able to look in a mirror if you had acted differently.  You did what you felt was right at the time, NO ONE can do any better than that.

[TAB]

people have to want to help themselfs. 

[Sponsor]

[tombogan03884]

No good deed goes unpunished ?
Mark Twain once wrote a piece to the effect that no lie or evil deed he had ever been guilty of had ever kept him awake at night.
It was the GOOD deeds unappreciated that set him to cursing in the sleepless wee hours.

[PegLeg45]

Dakota,
I've been down the road of helping someone out, and then getting 'burned'......... so many times that I should look like I've been beaten with a hot branding iron.

But, I've always tried to live by the philosophy that it's better to help than to have to be helped.

Like others have said, my conscience is clear and I can look in the mirror and know that I've always tried to do what I can for others (within my means and without hurting my family).

It's frustrating, and I do understand your rant (my very understanding wife has heard mine many times).

So, rant all you want, pal.....that's what we're here for.

[Dakotaranger]

My conscience is clear and she wouldn't be with us if I hadn't.  I just needed to gripe cause I can't help her any more

[Pathfinder]

DR - Tom was right on the money - she has to want to be helped and mean it before anything positive can happen. Hard lesson to learn, but it looks like more than a few of us have had to learn that one. I had a friend in Bismarck who literally lost everything trying to be nice to a user.

Hang in their brother, you did everything right, the issue is not with you.

PS: See you in Mandan on the 26th? PM me with when you think you'll be there and we can meet up.

[Ichiban]

DR - You did the right thing.   

It is so hard to watch a friend self-destruct but your attempt to help did make a difference even if you can't see it.  I'm not big on giving to charitable organization (and have always resisted the United Way extortion at work) but I'll give a friend/family all that I can.  Have I been burned?  Oh yeah - big time.  Has it ever worked out well?  Yes it has although it wasn't always immediately obvious.  Would/will I do it again?  Definitely.

There will be other guns but friends are precious.  Even the ones you occasionally want to strangle.