Florida, like reality, only different

[fightingquaker13]

The cool thing about living in the sunshine state is all the money you save on drugs. I mean, who needs them when reality is this bizarre? Its been a banner week here in Florida. 1st item, the seventy year old mayor of South Palm Beach has been arraigned for assaulting a bouncer at a strip club after they threw him out for shining a flaslight at the dancers (no idea if it was a "tactical" light or not). Second, a group booked a prominent Holocaust denier to speak to a "select group, invitation only" at the Ritz Carlton, where, naturally, two of the select group, a neo-nazi and a skin head, got into a knife fight. I'm sure the Ritz is thrilled, and should be inventorying their white sheets. Finally, from up in ST. Petersburg we have a report of a youg girl who invited her dad, a Fish and Wild Life officer, to come to show and tell. Dad complied and brought what everyone would agree is a sane and reasonable choice of items for a kindergarten class, a five foot alligator. To no one's surprise, the gator's agenda differed from the bone head's and it promptly made its escape (all kiddies uneaten). Ahh, Florida, where everyday you get to read the paper and yell WTF.
FQ13

[GUNS-R-US]

The cool thing about living in the sunshine state is all the money you save on drugs. I mean, who needs them when reality is this bizarre. ...... Finally, from up in the Pan-Handle we have a report of a youg girl who invited her dad, a Fish and Wild Life officer to come to show and tell. Dad complied and brought what everyone would agree is a sane and reasonable choice of items for a kindergarten class, a five foot alligator. To no one's surprise, the gator's agenda differed from the bone heads and it promptly made its escape (all kiddies uneaten). Ahh, Florida, where everyday you get to read the paper and yell WTF.
FQ13

  FQ, What part of the pan handle was that? I originate from them parts.

[fightingquaker13]

  FQ, What part of the pan handle was that? I originate from them parts.

Actually, thanks for asking. Your question made me dig up the article. It was in Saint Pete, not the pan-handle, I just had Pennsacola in my head for some reason. The cool thing about this is that we can now blame Haz.
FQ13

[1911 Junkie]

Actually, thanks for asking. Your question made me dig up the article. It was in Saint Pete, not the pan-handle, I just had Pennsacola in my head for some reason. The cool thing about this is that we can now blame Haz.
FQ13

I don't think so. It never would have made it to the class. Haz would have eaten it long before that. 

[tombogan03884]

Don't skip the drugs FQ, during carter I drugs and money laundering kept Fla. from bankruptcy. They may save the day under carter II  

[Sponsor]

[twyacht]

Don't forget we have Alan Grayson, House Rep. (Orlando area), who thinks Republicans just want the old and sick to "Die Quickly".

Fed Reserve aides are whores, and of course, RINO Crist, and Sen. Nelson...D-FL..

Corrupt Local City Councils, and Mickey Mouse...

We still have the death penalty, but a death row inmate costs MILLIONS...for his care up until their execution...

But it's Stone Crab season now, so it's all good....

[fightingquaker13]

Don't forget we have Alan Grayson, House Rep. (Orlando area), who thinks Republicans just want the old and sick to "Die Quickly".

Fed Reserve aides are whores, and of course, RINO Crist, and Sen. Nelson...D-FL..

Corrupt Local City Councils, and Mickey Mouse...

We still have the death penalty, but a death row inmate costs MILLIONS...for his care up until their execution...

But it's Stone Crab season now, so it's all good....

$16.99 for jumbos at Josephs market on the northwest corner of Military Trail and North Lake Blvd in Palm Beach Gardens. Offer good through Tuesday, they'll even crack them, if you are still working in Riviera. You can't beat that price with a stick. Treat yourself to a good lunch with a couple of cold beers, click your heels together 3 times, have the third beer, and it all gets better, I promise.  Or at least tastes more like melted butter, cold beer and stone crab, which is always an improvement.
FQ13

[Big Frank]

Cops: Fla. man stole ferret by shoving it in pants

JACKSONVILLE BEACH, Fla. — It's one thing for shoplifters to hide plunder in their pants. But a live ferret? Police said a homeless man in north Florida did just that. And he made it out the door before being challenged. Rodney Bolton, 38, was charged with theft over the $129 animal that police say he took from a pet store in Jacksonville Beach.

A 17-year-old witness confronted Bolton in the parking lot and was bitten by the animal after the man allegedly shoved it in the teen's face.

That confrontation makes the ferret a "special weapon" under Florida law. So Bolton also faces battery charges for dangerously wielding the animal.

Calls to the Jacksonville Sheriff's Department to see if Bolton has a lawyer were not answered early Thursday.

[tombogan03884]

 Wow, I thought Ca. was f-cked up

[fightingquaker13]

I'll give you F'd up, and it doesn't even relate to Fl. In England, the midlands, there is a "sport" called ferret legging. Here our heroes don a pair of white trousers, the better to show the blood,  tie the cuffs off and insert one or more ferrets into the waist band which is also cinched. The "winner", otherwise known as the biggest jackass, is the one who keeps his pants on the longest before dropping trou and letting the crazed carnivorous weasels escape. One would think that evolution would have bred this out of the population, but no. It does give us a clue as to how the Brits conquered the world though. They had a pool of enlisted personell who were tough as nails and dumber than a post. Hold this rifle and march that way. "Sir yes sir". Yikes.
FQ13 who has a bit more regard for the family jewels, and may be dumb on occasion, but still understands that putting a pissed off weasel in your pants is a bad idea.