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Member Section => Down Range Cafe => Topic started by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 09:54:08 AM

Title: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 09:54:08 AM: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women

#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

# 9. You can keep one gun at home and have another for when
you're on the road.

# 8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably
let you try it out a few times.

# 7. Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

# 6. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

# 5. A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

# 4. Guns function normally every day of the month.

# 3. A gun doesn't ask , 'Do these new grips make me look fat?'

# 2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the number one reason guns are better then women....

# 1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A GUN
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: jaybet on October 22, 2008, 11:21:16 AM: Ooooooo, I'm tellin' M'ette. I can't WAIT till she gits aholtz on you!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 11:24:49 AM: Jaybeth,

Those thoughts are not in the best Ranger tradition!

(But you're right ;D...I'll bring the popcorn (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/ernaehrung/food-smiley-007.gif) )
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Majer on October 22, 2008, 11:55:35 AM: I'm thinking he should have added "Except for M'ette" to the subject line... :o
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 12:11:49 PM: Quote from: Majer on October 22, 2008, 11:55:35 AM
I'm thinking he should have added "Except for M'ette" to the subject line... :o

Never met the woman. :)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 12:44:31 PM: Quote from: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 12:11:49 PM
Never met the woman. :)

Never met her either, but she still scares the begeebers out of me.

Not sure which is worse around here, stepping in the litter box or crossing M'ette ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: jaybet on October 22, 2008, 01:08:34 PM: I think ericire should come right back out with
Top Ten Reasons why a Woman WITH a Gun is better than Women or Guns.
Then he might stand a chance.

I'm reallly just kidding...M'ette is a sweetheart.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 01:19:17 PM: Quote from: jaybethel on October 22, 2008, 01:08:34 PM
I think ericire should come right back out with
Top Ten Reasons why a Woman WITH a Gun is better than Women or Guns.
Then he might stand a chance.

I'm reallly just kidding...M'ette is a sweetheart.

A sweetheart that can shoot the ticks off of a deer's back at 200 yards
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 01:39:56 PM: Quote from: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 01:19:17 PM
A sweetheart that can shoot the ticks off of a deer's back at 200 yards

Let the kissin up start :-*
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 01:41:02 PM: Quote from: m58 on October 22, 2008, 01:39:56 PM
Let the kissin up start :-*

Nah.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: tumblebug on October 22, 2008, 02:15:21 PM: Why poke the JAGUAR? ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 02:32:12 PM: Quote from: tumblebug on October 22, 2008, 02:15:21 PM
Why poke the JAGUAR? ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Cougar? ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 02:34:18 PM: Quote from: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 02:32:12 PM
Cougar? ;D

DEFINITELY!! ;) 8)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 22, 2008, 04:23:20 PM: Quote from: m58 on October 22, 2008, 01:39:56 PM
Let the kissin up start :-*

Quote from: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 01:41:02 PM
Nah.

Uhhhhhhhhh... Nah??!??!??!! Ex--cuuuuse me?? I do not think Nah should be in your vocabulary right about now, Mr. " I never met the woman" .............. and...........

# 2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.??!!??

(http://www.rightnation.us/forums/style_emoticons/default/yeahthat.gif)

We don't mind if you go to sleep afterwords either.. if you EVER did enough of anything to make you tired.
(((8 sec rides ONLY pertain to bull riding, Mr. Super Stud.. ;) ::)) )))

And I don't know if I can shoot the ticks off of a deer's back.......but.... I CAN tell you that this 'OLD 44 that is at home'... can damned sure take care of that 'new 22' you ..have on the road.............

Yep...the guys are right.........Ya better soften up those lips ericire12 .......cause I do believe that my ass will be meeting them real soon.
(http://www.rightnation.us/forums/style_emoticons/default/kissass.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Marshal Halloway on October 22, 2008, 04:29:44 PM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 22, 2008, 04:23:20 PM
Yep...the guys are right.........Ya better soften up those lips ericire12 .......cause I do believe that my ass will be meeting them real soon.[/b]
(http://www.rightnation.us/forums/style_emoticons/default/kissass.gif)

Lord have mercy on their souls.....

Prayers are sent.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 22, 2008, 04:33:58 PM: I think Eric should cozy up to a higher class of women! :D Maybe a little less synthetic in nature!!! ;D

It might change your opinion!!!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 22, 2008, 04:41:53 PM: Timmy dear...............

((feel the ice cracking under your feet?)) ;)

;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 22, 2008, 05:31:40 PM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 22, 2008, 04:41:53 PM
Timmy dear...............

((feel the ice cracking under your feet?)) ;)

;D

I've fallen through it before M'ette but I was not, I repeat NOT, refering to anyone one who frequents this fine message board! :-[

I've always prefered women to firearms and I've always been a perfect gentleman. Think of COLD steel and a WARM body, it's a NO BRAINER!!!!!

;) ;)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 05:36:18 PM: Nothing personal Timmy, but I'm headin for the bunker, and your on your own!

The only advice I can give you is quit tryin ... all you'll do is make the grave digger's job easier.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 22, 2008, 05:38:15 PM: Reason #11... Check my siggy. ;)

... at least I know when the gun is going to go off on me! :)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 22, 2008, 05:46:24 PM: Quote from: Timothy on October 22, 2008, 05:31:40 PM

I've always prefered women to firearms and I've always been a perfect gentleman. Think of COLD steel and a WARM body, it's a NO BRAINER!!!!!

;) ;)

weeelllllll........................okay..I'll buy it............THIS TIME.. ;)

m58....you can poke your head out of the bunker.......my pistols are unloaded.
((but the shovel hasn't been put back in the barn yet.)) ;D

jumbo frank...............I DO have some very high hip boots..but I don't think that they will be high enough..................... ::) ::) But feel free to continue to try to convince me. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ellis4538 on October 22, 2008, 05:47:04 PM: At least with a gun you know when you dun somethin wrong...your group looks like s..t - with a woman you can never be sure!

Richard

PS: I've worn a path to the doghouse and it has revolving doors!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 22, 2008, 05:49:18 PM: Quote from: ellis4538 on October 22, 2008, 05:47:04 PM
At least with a gun you know when you dun somethin wrong...your group looks like s..t - with a woman you can never be sure!

Richard

PS: I've worn a path to the doghouse and it has revolving doors!!!!!!!!!

Good ! Then you won't get lost when you are going there again tonight will you. Dress warm.. supposed to be in the 40's..

(http://www.cascity.com/howard/animations/doghouse.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 05:51:04 PM: HELP !!! My last post is stuck between Tim and Frank

Oh dear God, I'm gonna get caught in the crossfire, and all I did was try and warn em :'(
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 22, 2008, 05:57:05 PM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 22, 2008, 05:46:24 PM

weeelllllll........................okay..I'll buy it............THIS TIME.. ;)

So I guess you've put away the shotgun and the rocksalt? :D

((P.S. Where do you get all those emoticons? That keester-kisser one is a HOOT!!!))
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 22, 2008, 05:57:32 PM: I'm not saying all women go off without warning, for no reason at all, just my ex. I must be really screwed up because I attract a lot of psychos.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: blackwolfe on October 22, 2008, 07:03:47 PM: After reading this post, I guess I didn't miss the fireworks after all this year.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 07:32:05 PM: Official notice (http://www.mazeguy.net/employed/judge.gif)

(http://www.mazeguy.net/musical/sing.gif) Hear ye Hear ye....

(http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/cool/cool-smiley-008.gif) Hazcat did NOT start this one!..... (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/engel/angel-smiley-008.gif)

but he did have the popcorn consession! (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/ernaehrung/food-smiley-007.gif) (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/cool/cool-smiley-014.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 07:45:48 PM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 22, 2008, 04:23:20 PM

Uhhhhhhhhh... Nah??!??!??!! Ex--cuuuuse me?? I do not think Nah should be in your vocabulary right about now, Mr. " I never met the woman" .............. and...........

# 2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.??!!??

(http://www.rightnation.us/forums/style_emoticons/default/yeahthat.gif)

We don't mind if you go to sleep afterwords either.. if you EVER did enough of anything to make you tired.
(((8 sec rides ONLY pertain to bull riding, Mr. Super Stud.. ;) ::)) )))

And I don't know if I can shoot the ticks off of a deer's back.......but.... I CAN tell you that this 'OLD 44 that is at home'... can damned sure take care of that 'new 22' you ..have on the road.............

Yep...the guys are right.........Ya better soften up those lips ericire12 .......cause I do believe that my ass will be meeting them real soon.
(http://www.rightnation.us/forums/style_emoticons/default/kissass.gif)

Well, I think she just proved #1 on the list and/or #4...... and I know every woman falls into the category of #3....

..... Love ya M'ette! ;D ....... Damn it. Shouldn't have said that....... Now I have to worry about how well Marshal can shoot at 200 yards...... I better just lay low for a while...... now where did I put that Bug-Out-Bag of mine?!?!?
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 22, 2008, 07:49:13 PM: I got this email today about Marvin, men's answer to all those Maxine comics.

Men strike back!

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
-----------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
-----------------------------------------------------------
I married Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
----------------------------------------------------
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
------------------------------------------------------
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
------------------------------------------------------
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: jaybet on October 22, 2008, 07:51:08 PM: Told ya so....
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: blackwolfe on October 22, 2008, 07:55:12 PM: Haz,
Better pop some more corn, I think the show's going to last awhile.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 22, 2008, 07:56:00 PM: (http://www.rightnation.us/forums/style_emoticons/default/groan.gif)

I'm outnumbered.... BUT....... not defeated!.... ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 22, 2008, 08:01:23 PM: Ok Kids, I've got a question!

How can you tell that the dog is REALLY mans best friend?
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 22, 2008, 08:10:41 PM: I don't know. Is it because he doesn't mind taking the blame for your farts? ;D

Earlier today I was thinking about how a dog is mans best friend and diamonds are a girls best friend. What a load of crap. The guys get a bad deal again. Or do we? I bought my bride a ring with a bunch of diamonds in it. And I had to buy my own ring too. What did I get in return? I got a used dog! A hand me down mutt that's had 5 previous owners. WTF? How is that fair? A bunch of diamonds for them and flea-bitten used dogs for us. But I bet her diamonds don't keep her happy all day and warm at night. Dogs are better than diamonds.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 08:11:09 PM: It's been good knowing you all :-\

I'd head for the bunker, but I fear strategic nuclear launch is imminent :-\

Haz ... pop me one up with extra butter. No need watchin the diet now, for I fear when she lets loose we're all gonna get splattered.

Direct hit or little bits of Tim and Frank ... It don't matter ... It's all a mess :-\
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 22, 2008, 08:18:04 PM: Quote from: jumbofrank on October 22, 2008, 08:10:41 PM
I don't know. Is it because he doesn't mind taking the blame for your farts? ;D

Take your dog and your wife and lock em both in the trunk of your car. After an hour, who's still happy to see ya? ;D ;D ;D

I live with two women and they both loved that joke!!! ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 08:27:27 PM: Here ya go Tim and Frank (http://www.mazeguy.net/symbolic/shovel.gif) your gonna need it one way or another. (http://www.mazeguy.net/symbolic/tombstone.gif)

(http://www.mazeguy.net/happy/rotfl.gif) (http://www.mazeguy.net/happy/rotfl.gif) (http://www.mazeguy.net/happy/rotfl.gif) (http://www.mazeguy.net/angry/stirthepot.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 22, 2008, 08:30:37 PM: Keep stirring the pot Haz. :)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 08:42:59 PM: Quote from: jumbofrank on October 22, 2008, 08:30:37 PM
Keep stirring the pot Haz. :)

Who ??....ME!....NEVER!! (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/engel/angel-smiley-027.gif)

(http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/teufel/devil-smiley-029.gif) (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/teufel/devil-smiley-045.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 22, 2008, 08:50:55 PM: I've seen that before... the number one reason always reminds me of an old joke....

Whats the best part about a blow job?

wait for it...

The 5 mins of silence.

;D

Yeah, yeah I know, but I like sleeping in the dog house. :P
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 09:02:04 PM: (http://www.mazeguy.net/surprised/yikes.gif) YIKES! (http://www.mazeguy.net/surprised/duck.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 22, 2008, 09:05:14 PM: It might be time to join the Merchant Marines. I'm heading for the hills!!! :-[ :-[ :-[

Where's Deepwater?
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 09:10:36 PM: Quote from: Timothy on October 22, 2008, 09:05:14 PM
It might be time to join the Merchant Marines. I'm heading for the hills!!! :-[ :-[ :-[

Where's Deepwater?

He went out to get drun....err...I mean he went to his wifes' cousins birthday party.

As to my first explanation, well............let's just say they took a cab. ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: blackwolfe on October 22, 2008, 09:12:41 PM: Well, might as well state my sexist line. You do know that men and women start out the same, but as they develope, the man parts fall off the dumb ones.

Thought I might as well join the gang. How do you join the Foreign Legion and disappear.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 09:21:43 PM: Quote from: blackwolfe on October 22, 2008, 09:12:41 PM
Well, might as well state my sexist line. You do know that men and women start out the same, but as they develope, the man parts fall off the dumb ones.

Thought I might as well join the gang. How do you join the Foreign Legion and disappear.

I'm not sure, but if'n I were you I'd make sure my passport was current and I'd be booking tickets!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: saltydogbk on October 22, 2008, 09:23:32 PM: this is better than cartoons ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 09:24:56 PM: Quote from: jumbofrank on October 22, 2008, 08:30:37 PM
Keep stirring the pot Haz. :)

Careful Haz!

They're gonna suck you in somehow ... remember what I said about splatter :o
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 09:29:40 PM: Quote from: m58 on October 22, 2008, 09:24:56 PM
Careful Haz!

They're gonna suck you in somehow ... remember what I said about splatter :o

I've always been a 'ring side' seat, kinda guy. ;)

and doing a little (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/aktion/action-smiley-054.gif) is fun! (ya...a little dangerous too but , what the hey. No guts, no glory ;D )
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 22, 2008, 09:30:16 PM: Now the newbies think they're gonna run and hide ::)

Remember in Sunday School when they told you that Jesus sat at God's right hand?

Guess who sits at the left (no political meaning here ... PLEASE don't suck me in ... PLEASE) ... M'ette sits there, and she's privy to all knowledge.

YOU CAN RUN BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE !!!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 09:32:37 PM: Quote from: m58 on October 22, 2008, 09:30:16 PM
Now the newbies think they're gonna run and hide ::)

Remember in Sunday School when they told you that Jesus sat at God's right hand?

Guess who sits at the left (no political meaning here ... PLEASE don't suck me in ... PLEASE) ... M'ette sits there, and she's privy to all knowledge.

YOU CAN RUN BUT ~~YOU CAN'T HIDE~~ !!!

....YOU'LL JUST DIE TIRED!!

;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 09:34:22 PM: Chris Rock on women:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fQyz_aecNc&feature=related

on marriage:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AS13dTbAdcI&feature=related

Content Warning!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Fatman on October 22, 2008, 09:54:07 PM: Boy, you guys think it was a good idea to poke M'ette like this? Her first husband told her this 'guns better than women' joke right before she went hunting for a gubment job:

Quote
A few years ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill, and there's a lot of testing and background checks involved before you can even be considered for the position. After sending some applicants through the background checks, training and testing, they narrowed the possible choices down to 2 men and a woman, but only one position was available. The day came for the final test to see which person would get the extremely secretive job. The CIA men administering the test took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances" they explained. "Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her." The man got a shocked look on his face and said, "You can't be serious! I could never shoot my own wife!" "Well", says the CIA man, "You're definitely not the right man for this job then." So they bring the second man to the same door and hand him a gun. "We must know that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances", they explained to the second man. "Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her." The second man looked a bit shocked, but nevertheless took the gun and went in the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes, then the door opened. The man came out of the room with tears in his eyes. "I tried to shoot her, I just couldn't pull the trigger and shoot my wife. I guess I'm not the right man for the job." "No" the CIA man replied, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home." Now they're down to the woman left to test. Again they lead her to the same door to the same room and handed her the same gun. "We must be sure that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances, this is your final test. Inside you will find your husband sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill him." The woman took the gun and opened the door. Before the door even closed all the way, the CIA men heard the gun start firing. One shot after another for 13 shots. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. This went on for several minutes, then all went quiet. The door opened slowly, and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks! I had to beat him to death with the chair!"
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Pathfinder on October 22, 2008, 10:11:17 PM: Quote from: jumbofrank on October 22, 2008, 05:57:32 PM
I'm not saying all women go off without warning, for no reason at all, just my ex. I must be really screwed up because I attract a lot of psychos.

You and me both, Frank, you and me both! :'(
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Pathfinder on October 22, 2008, 10:20:49 PM: Quote from: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 09:29:40 PM
I've always been a 'ring side' seat, kinda guy. ;)

and doing a little (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/aktion/action-smiley-054.gif) is fun! (ya...a little dangerous too but , what the hey. No guts, no glory ;D )

What, no stick-whacking-the-hornet's-nest emoticon? Come on, Haz, I thought you were hip, happening and now with the 'cons. What happened to you , man??

;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 10:51:39 PM: Quote from: Pathfinder on October 22, 2008, 10:20:49 PM
What, no stick-whacking-the-hornet's-nest emoticon? Come on, Haz, I thought you were hip, happening and now with the 'cons. What happened to you , man??

;D

I got old? (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/fragend/confused-smiley-013.gif)

Heck I'm so old I remember using "hip" and "happening"! ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 22, 2008, 10:54:20 PM: And now to take this thread too a whole new level

(http://newmedia.funnyjunk.com/pictures/kkk-rollin.jpg)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 10:55:14 PM: Quote from: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 10:51:39 PM
I got old? (http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/fragend/confused-smiley-013.gif)

Heck I'm so old I remember using "hip" and "happening"! ;D

Now he just says "Doc, can you tell me what is happening with my hip."
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 10:55:59 PM: TAB, what the hell?!?
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Hazcat on October 22, 2008, 10:57:29 PM: Quote from: ericire12 on October 22, 2008, 10:55:14 PM
Now he just says "Doc, can you tell me what is happening with my hip."

LOL!
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: m25operator on October 22, 2008, 11:05:18 PM: Cone heads 2, the March for Obama?
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 23, 2008, 12:11:10 AM: I always figured you need some kind of disability to join the Klan but thought it was mental, not physical.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Ocin on October 23, 2008, 05:34:19 AM: Ok, we have to end this guys! Sorry M'ette, but it has been proven mathematically that women are indeed evil. Here is the mathematican equasion:

To prove is wether Women are Evil: W=E

First: Women require Time and Money: W=T*M

Second: Time is Money: T=M

This leads to: W=M*M=M^2

We also know: Money is the root of all Evil: M=√E

We have already established: W=M^2=√E*√E=E

Hence: W=E

Women are Evil.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: jaybet on October 23, 2008, 06:16:04 AM: That's funny! That's the littlest dude from Remulac I've ever seen. I didn't know they came that small- they could hide almost anywhere...like inside a tree?
I think we should add a second layer to the tin liners in our tinfoil hats.
Wait a minute...Ocin proved women are evil...you always see them carrying around these little dudes...
I see where you're going with this, TAB- thank God we have someone with the wherewithal to tie this together for us.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: blackwolfe on October 23, 2008, 06:50:25 PM: Hey guys, I think were in BIG trouble. M'ette has been too quiet for too long. I'm afraid she really has something up her sleeve for us.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: twyacht on October 23, 2008, 07:30:46 PM: After blazing through 7 pages of posts, with Christmas coming there are a few members that are getting COAL!

Ballet dancing through a mine field usually yields the same result. What's the phrase?

Hell Hath No Fury,...Like A Woman's Scorn.... Teddy Roosevelt comes to mind "Speak softly, and be accurate with the shovel,...." ::)

My wife still hates the fact, and reminds me often, that I buy too much ammo (is that even possible?). 8)

Plus with Marshal'ette, the treats are over,.... Watch out.

Happy Halloween
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 23, 2008, 08:48:22 PM: Quote from: twyacht on October 23, 2008, 07:30:46 PM
After blazing through 7 pages of posts, with Christmas coming there are a few members that are getting COAL!

Ballet dancing through a mine field usually yields the same result. What's the phrase?

Hell Hath No Fury,...Like A Woman's Scorn.... Teddy Roosevelt comes to mind "Speak softly, and be accurate with the shovel,...." ::)

My wife still hates the fact, and reminds me often, that I buy too much ammo (is that even possible?). 8)

Plus with Marshal'ette, the treats are over,.... Watch out.

Happy Halloween

We are getting Christmas presents? SWEET! Jay already got an M&P9. I cant wait to see what I get :)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: deepwater on October 23, 2008, 10:03:20 PM: 8) looks like some of us will need to take lessons on damage control
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 23, 2008, 10:13:05 PM: You can't wait to see what you get??!!?? Really now.........
hmmmmmmmmm lets see.. YOU started this thread so I am sure I will think of something veeeery appropriate.

And I have been quiet because I have been busy working. Massages.. videos... bookwork... grandkids... domestic duties....all those things that "evil women" ::) have to do.

;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 23, 2008, 11:38:31 PM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 23, 2008, 10:13:05 PM
You can't wait to see what you get??!!?? Really now.........
hmmmmmmmmm lets see.. YOU started this thread so I am sure I will think of something veeeery appropriate.

And I have been quiet because I have been busy working. Massages.. videos... bookwork... grandkids... domestic duties....all those things that "evil women" ::) have to do.

;D

This is what I want for Xmas...

(http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n104/The_AnkLe_BiTeR/386bounce.gif)

If you get it for me, I pormise I'll be good... ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 24, 2008, 12:04:22 AM: hahahaha.....well Tab.....people in hell want ice water too...........but we all know the outcome on that one. LOL
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 24, 2008, 12:10:06 AM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 24, 2008, 12:04:22 AM
hahahaha.....well Tab.....people in hell want ice water too...........but we all know the outcome on that one. LOL

if they are jewish... there is no hell...
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 24, 2008, 12:17:09 AM: okay then..........................

shit in one hand and wish in the other one..see which one fills up faster..... ;)

The outcome is still the same on if you will get her or not. ;D ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 24, 2008, 12:22:56 AM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 24, 2008, 12:17:09 AM
okay then..........................

shit in one hand and wish in the other one..see which one fills up faster..... ;)

The outcome is still the same on if you will get her or not. ;D ;D

And now to make you feel old...

That is one of my grandfathers favorite sayings. :P

Yeah, I know, I'm an asshole.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: tombogan03884 on October 24, 2008, 12:42:17 AM: ;D

If you guys get a package from M'ette , listen VERY carefully, if it tick, it's probably NOT a Mickey Mouse watch ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 24, 2008, 03:53:55 AM: Quote from: TAB on October 23, 2008, 11:38:31 PM

This is what I want for Xmas...

(http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n104/The_AnkLe_BiTeR/386bounce.gif)

If you get it for me, I pormise I'll be good... ;D

I been hip-mo-tized.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Pathfinder on October 24, 2008, 06:23:45 AM: Quote from: TAB on October 24, 2008, 12:10:06 AM
if they are jewish... there is no hell...

Buzzzzzzzz - wrong answer!!

Jews have gehenna. That's at the very least purgatory if not flat out hell.

Nice try though.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: jaybet on October 24, 2008, 06:52:14 AM: In heaven there is no beer....that's why we drink it here.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Pathfinder on October 24, 2008, 06:56:29 AM: Quote from: jumbofrank on October 24, 2008, 03:53:55 AM

I been hip-mo-tized.

Me too.

Hip-mo-tized - You a Kevin Matthews fan?
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: ericire12 on October 24, 2008, 07:33:20 AM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 23, 2008, 10:13:05 PM
You can't wait to see what you get??!!?? Really now.........
hmmmmmmmmm lets see.. YOU started this thread so I am sure I will think of something veeeery appropriate.

And I have been quiet because I have been busy working. Massages.. videos... bookwork... grandkids... domestic duties....all those things that "evil women" ::) have to do.

;D

Cooking, cleaning, and washing machine-ing..... ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TSB on October 24, 2008, 07:47:19 AM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 23, 2008, 10:13:05 PM
You can't wait to see what you get??!!?? Really now.........
hmmmmmmmmm lets see.. YOU started this thread so I am sure I will think of something veeeery appropriate.

And I have been quiet because I have been busy working. Massages.. videos... bookwork... grandkids... domestic duties....all those things that "evil women" ::) have to do.

;D

Massages & videos? Interesting!!! ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: MikeBjerum on October 24, 2008, 07:50:20 AM: Quote from: ericire12 on October 24, 2008, 07:33:20 AM
Cooking, cleaning, and washing machine-ing..... ;D

And then there was the comment made by a worker at the local Toro plant "It's fall and time to go home and convert the dishwasher to a snowblower ... Gonna buy the )(&*^( a shovel."

Forgive me M'ette, and be with the starving Pigmies in New Guinea :-[
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Pathfinder on October 24, 2008, 07:35:47 PM: Quote from: m58 on October 24, 2008, 07:50:20 AM
And then there was the comment made by a worker at the local Toro plant "It's fall and time to go home and convert the dishwasher to a snowblower ... Gonna buy the )(&*^( a shovel."

Forgive me M'ette, and be with the starving Pigmies in New Guinea :-[

Now that right thar is funny, you gotta admit! ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Rastus on October 24, 2008, 07:54:19 PM: Quote from: Timothy on October 22, 2008, 08:18:04 PM
Take your dog and your wife and lock em both in the trunk of your car. After an hour, who's still happy to see ya? ;D ;D ;D

I live with two women and they both loved that joke!!! ;D

They just let you think they loved that joke...... :o
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Majer on October 24, 2008, 08:49:32 PM: Quote from: TAB on October 23, 2008, 11:38:31 PM

This is what I want for Xmas...

(http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n104/The_AnkLe_BiTeR/386bounce.gif)

If you get it for me, I pormise I'll be good... ;D

Tab...You want breast implants? :o :o :o
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Fatman on October 24, 2008, 09:01:19 PM: Quote from: Majer on October 24, 2008, 08:49:32 PM
Tab...You want breast implants? :o :o :o

Great. There's an image that'll ruin my sleep.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 24, 2008, 09:24:06 PM: Quote from: Pathfinder on October 24, 2008, 06:56:29 AM
Me too.

Hip-mo-tized - You a Kevin Matthews fan?

I never heard of him. David Letterman used to say it a long time ago. I done been hip-mo-tized! He pronounced all 3 syllables seperately like that.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 24, 2008, 09:33:26 PM: Quote from: Majer on October 24, 2008, 08:49:32 PM
Tab...You want breast implants? :o :o :o
those are real... i
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 24, 2008, 09:40:46 PM: Silly-cones don't wiggle and jiggle like that. :-*

P.S. I never knew there was a "suckling" smilie. ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 25, 2008, 11:31:28 PM: Quote from: jumbofrank on October 24, 2008, 03:53:55 AM

I been hip-mo-tized.

Well.. for all you hip-mo-tized old farts who like the wiggly and jiggly...

This one is for you...................

Hope you all have sweet dreams with vivid images.........
nighty night boys............:-*

(http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj216/marshalette/bigboobs.gif)
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Rastus on October 25, 2008, 11:38:39 PM: Marshall'ette....that's sick.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Teresa Heilevang on October 26, 2008, 12:40:05 AM: yeah....................................I know................... ;D
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: TAB on October 26, 2008, 12:41:38 AM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 26, 2008, 12:40:05 AM
yeah....................................I know................... ;D

Must resist posting more gifs... must resist...
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 26, 2008, 06:38:54 PM: Quote from: Marshal'ette Halloway on October 25, 2008, 11:31:28 PM

Well.. for all you hip-mo-tized old farts who like the wiggly and jiggly...

This one is for you...................

Hope you all have sweet dreams with vivid images.........
nighty night boys............:-*

(http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/jj216/marshalette/bigboobs.gif)

I think she worked at GM. If she turned around I could get a better look. Lot's of GM women get the AC spread from sitting all day.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: tombogan03884 on October 27, 2008, 12:26:54 AM: We have assemblers in the "Clean room" where I work that could compare, I think they hire them by the pound.
Title: Re: Top 10 reasons guns are better then women
Post by: Big Frank on October 27, 2008, 10:55:35 PM: We had a supervisor who was skinny from the waist up but looked like she was smuggling watermelons in her back pockets. That was way beyond ghetto booty.