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Author Topic: Classic joke thread...  (Read 1364593 times)

Badgersmilk

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1680 on: April 03, 2009, 04:17:12 PM »
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Badgersmilk

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1681 on: April 03, 2009, 04:38:25 PM »
It's never a bad time for chocolate.
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1682 on: April 04, 2009, 08:56:44 PM »
Fruit flasher.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Bill Stryker

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1683 on: April 04, 2009, 09:00:35 PM »
A husband in his back yard is trying to fly a kite..

He throws the kite up in the air.

The wind catches it for a few seconds, then it comes crashing back down to earth.

He tries this a few more times with no success.

All the while, his wife is watching from the kitchen window,

Muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything.

She opens the window and yells to her husband,

'You need a piece of tail.'

The man turns with a confused look on his face and says,

'Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite.'
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PegLeg45

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1684 on: April 04, 2009, 09:55:51 PM »
Truth is stranger than........


 :o

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"I expect perdition, I always have. I keep this building at my back, and several guns handy, in case perdition arrives in a form that's susceptible to bullets. I expect it will come in the disease form, though. I'm susceptible to diseases, and you can't shoot a damned disease." ~ Judge Roy Bean, Streets of Laredo

For the Patriots of this country, the Constitution is second only to the Bible for most. For those who love this country, but do not share my personal beliefs, it is their Bible. To them nothing comes before the Constitution of these United States of America. For this we are all labeled potential terrorists. ~ Dean Garrison

"When it comes to the enemy, just because they ain't pullin' a trigger, doesn't mean they ain't totin' ammo for those that are."~PegLeg

Sponsor

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1685 on: Today at 12:49:50 AM »
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1685 on: April 04, 2009, 10:25:48 PM »
He should have hired a man, not a Maus.  ;)
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

ellis4538

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1686 on: April 05, 2009, 04:26:43 AM »
BOO, HISSSSS, BOOOO, HISSS!!!!!!!!
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Hazcat

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1687 on: April 05, 2009, 09:30:03 AM »
Quote from: jumbofrank on April 04, 2009, 10:25:48 PM
He should have hired a man, not a Maus.  ;)


***GROAN!**********





;D
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All tipoes and misspelings are copi-righted.  Pleeze do not reuse without ritten persimmons  :D

PegLeg45

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1688 on: April 05, 2009, 06:58:52 PM »
I reckon size does matter.......... sometimes..........   :o   :o
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"I expect perdition, I always have. I keep this building at my back, and several guns handy, in case perdition arrives in a form that's susceptible to bullets. I expect it will come in the disease form, though. I'm susceptible to diseases, and you can't shoot a damned disease." ~ Judge Roy Bean, Streets of Laredo

For the Patriots of this country, the Constitution is second only to the Bible for most. For those who love this country, but do not share my personal beliefs, it is their Bible. To them nothing comes before the Constitution of these United States of America. For this we are all labeled potential terrorists. ~ Dean Garrison

"When it comes to the enemy, just because they ain't pullin' a trigger, doesn't mean they ain't totin' ammo for those that are."~PegLeg

PegLeg45

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #1689 on: April 05, 2009, 07:03:15 PM »
What kind of clothes to wear when the little woman has chores lined up for you.......
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"I expect perdition, I always have. I keep this building at my back, and several guns handy, in case perdition arrives in a form that's susceptible to bullets. I expect it will come in the disease form, though. I'm susceptible to diseases, and you can't shoot a damned disease." ~ Judge Roy Bean, Streets of Laredo

For the Patriots of this country, the Constitution is second only to the Bible for most. For those who love this country, but do not share my personal beliefs, it is their Bible. To them nothing comes before the Constitution of these United States of America. For this we are all labeled potential terrorists. ~ Dean Garrison

"When it comes to the enemy, just because they ain't pullin' a trigger, doesn't mean they ain't totin' ammo for those that are."~PegLeg
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