Classic joke thread...

[ellis4538]

True_Texan...I posted this a while back.  Thought I'd post it again for you now!

Why does the chicken cross the road in Texas?

To prove to the armadillo that it can be done!


FWIW

Richard

[Texas_Bryan]

True_Texan...I posted this a while back.  Thought I'd post it again for you now!

Why does the chicken cross the road in Texas?

To prove to the armadillo that it can be done!


FWIW

Richard

Those poor armadillos, be careful, they're the official small animal, rodent, of Texas.  But the next chicken I see crossing the road is dead, they've been warned.

[True_Texan]

LOL... That's great!

Got kind of a offensive one I suppose, but it goes along with the armadillo.

Why did God create the armadillo?

So mexicans could have something on the half-shell too!

[ericire12]

The southern version of that joke is "to show the opossum that it can be done".

[PegLeg45]

The southern version of that joke reality is "to show the opossum that it can be done".

Now, that's better.





 

[Sponsor]

[MinotBob]

Hillbilly Vasectomy



After their 11th child, a hillbilly couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.

So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. 'A less costly alternative, ' said the doctor, 'is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks are legal in hillbilly country) light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10.'

The hillbilly said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me.'

'Trust me,' said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count!

'1'


'2'


'3'


'4'


'5'


(you'll love this..)


At which point, he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and continued counting on his other hand.

This procedure works in Tennessee , Kentucky , Louisiana , Arkansas , Mississippi , Alabama , Georgia , Florida , Texas , West Virginia ....and Washington DC .

[brosometal]

Hillbilly Vasectomy



After their 11th child, a hillbilly couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.

So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive. 'A less costly alternative, ' said the doctor, 'is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks are legal in hillbilly country) light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10.'

The hillbilly said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me.'

'Trust me,' said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count!

'1'


'2'


'3'


'4'


'5'


(you'll love this..)


At which point, he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and continued counting on his other hand.

This procedure works in Tennessee , Kentucky , Louisiana , Arkansas , Mississippi , Alabama , Georgia , Florida , Texas , West Virginia ....and Washington DC .

I'm not sure but I think I have just been insulted... Haz what's the deal set me strait.

[Pathfinder]

I'm not sure but I think I have just been insulted... Haz what's the deal set me strait.

My Dad lived in Hudson, and once you got off Hwy 19 and went east a little, you saw the tin-roof shacks on stone pillars with 2-12 dead cars in the front yard.

Sound familiar, Bros?   

Glad to have you back. Went throught hat whole "reload Windows" act a gazillion times when my younger son was downloading so much stuff (including the real porn) that windows had no room for its massive swap file. Instead of Windows telling me nicely, I got the blue screen of death.

I've hated Gates ever since he refused to respond tot he claim that he developed his original software on U of NM computers - funded by DoD, and therefore public domain. He then called all of the computer hobbyists "thieves".

[ellis4538]

bro...you can only be insulted if you want to be otherwise you can laugh with the rest of us.  Bet that guy can't count to 11 anymore!!!!!!!

Richard

[Hazcat]

I'm not sure but I think I have just been insulted... Haz what's the deal set me strait.

I don't know....looks the the donkey is still laughing so I think it's OK.