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Author Topic: Classic joke thread...  (Read 1398239 times)

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5780 on: February 29, 2024, 08:21:26 AM »
Playing Chicken?
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

PegLeg45

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5781 on: February 29, 2024, 04:00:38 PM »
 8)
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"I expect perdition, I always have. I keep this building at my back, and several guns handy, in case perdition arrives in a form that's susceptible to bullets. I expect it will come in the disease form, though. I'm susceptible to diseases, and you can't shoot a damned disease." ~ Judge Roy Bean, Streets of Laredo

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"When it comes to the enemy, just because they ain't pullin' a trigger, doesn't mean they ain't totin' ammo for those that are."~PegLeg

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5782 on: March 01, 2024, 05:35:45 AM »
I like how they spelled Parabellum on the ammo boxes with the British slang for penis, bell end. Don't be a bell end. Don't stick your bell end where it shouldn't be.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5783 on: March 01, 2024, 05:37:18 AM »
I remember we wee talking about Safety Third before, and I just finished fixing up this image this morning. I'm going to make it match the resolution of my cell phone screen and use it as a background image.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5784 on: March 01, 2024, 11:33:36 AM »
I forgot to post the phone-size version of this I have as my home screen now. Anyone who wants it is welcome to it. Instead of 9x16 720p High Definition, it's 9x18.9 or 2.1 to 1. The top and bottom can be trimmed to fit other formats.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5785 on: Today at 08:25:38 PM »
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alfsauve

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5785 on: March 01, 2024, 01:38:41 PM »
I'm the poster boy for safety.

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Will work for ammo
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Rastus

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5786 on: March 01, 2024, 07:12:08 PM »
Ladders shake too much for me to get that high up....
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Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom.
It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
-William Pitt, British Prime-Minister (1759-1806)
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Big Frank

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5787 on: March 01, 2024, 07:20:44 PM »
I try not to use the top 2 steps on my stepladder, like it says, and even 4 feet up a 6 foot ladder sometimes it's shaky.
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""It may be laid down as a primary position, and the basis of our system, that every Citizen who enjoys the protection of a free Government, owes not only a proportion of his property, but even his personal services to the defence of it, and consequently that the Citizens of America (with a few legal and official exceptions) from 18 to 50 Years of Age should be borne on the Militia Rolls, provided with uniform Arms, and so far accustomed to the use of them, that the Total strength of the Country might be called forth at a Short Notice on any very interesting Emergency." - George Washington. Letter to Alexander Hamilton, Friday, May 02, 1783

THE RIGHT TO BUY WEAPONS IS THE RIGHT TO BE FREE - A. E. van Vogt, The Weapon Shops of Isher

TAB

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5788 on: March 02, 2024, 03:19:15 AM »
Some times your the reason for the safety meeting.  Some times they need sketchy shit.

I have spent a good part of my working life on a ladder
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I always break all the clay pigeons,  some times its even with lead.

Rastus

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Re: Classic joke thread...
« Reply #5789 on: March 02, 2024, 06:50:45 AM »
I liked to call unannounced safety meetings.  Everyone started to panic about someone getting fired, layoffs or drug searches or whatever...when they found out it was a safety meeting the point was taken and carried back into the field with them.

They should have known if wasn't someone getting fired...I always did that sort of thing very quietly and no one knew what had happened until they missed someone.
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Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom.
It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
-William Pitt, British Prime-Minister (1759-1806)
                                                                                                                               Avoid subjugation, join the NRA!
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